Nostalgic Reminiscences....!!!!

Moving on yet, standing still!

2011-07-14T11:23:00.000-07:00

We all move on in life! Don't we?

It wouldn't be wrong to say that life is all about moving on!

Moving on towards an unseen, unheard and unpredictable future.

In my limited span of life, I've very often come across people struggling to move on with the vagaries and vicissitudes of life. Professional upheavals, familial obligations, guilt drains, break-ups, heartaches, failure phobias - there may be a plethora of reasons. Though it is NOW that I realize how easy and difficult these are while preaching and practicing respectively!

Given my current state of mind, I really Want to move on. Rather I badly NEED to move on yet somewhere something tugs at my heart and appeals me to hold on for just a bit longer.

Till this day I thought that only 'unsaid departures' hurt deep, but at this juncture I am being compelled to contemplate that what about the well-called-for departures? Don't they hurt as bad as the unsaid ones!

Penancing Times

2011-07-13T06:45:00.000-07:00

Just when I thought that my life was on a perfect ride under the perfect reins, destiny played its trick yet again. And why not?! Life never fails to follow its forever-cherished dictum - An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth!

I am sure I must have been incredibly indifferent/rude to someone or many, that I have been robbed off my all patience and good times. Life hits back, HARD!

Well, there are sane souls out there who tout me as 'inhuman' and unworthy of being a human let alone a girl. Honestly, I do feel there must be some truth in their arguments, some credibility in their anguish and a tremendous amount of hatred and hurt in their value judgements. Why on earth otherwise would someone hate someone else with such intensity and vigour?!

I have no clue as to what went wrong or where and in what intensity. Though I do feel strongly about the fact that if I alone am the cause of all their worldly suffering and misery, then I should better keep myself (my-evil-self) away from them. After all they too deserve their fair share of undiluted happiness and contentment in life.

I know it's not going to be easy keeping away.. yet it will at least render me some amount of satisfaction thinking that they'll be happier 'off' me. I had nobody practically nobody in this world to share this piece of news with, so thought of coming back to Nostalgic Reminiscences and crying my heart out. Though now that I am here, I feel almost blank and rudderless. Huh! I think not even this blog loves me any more!

P.S. - I am not surprised. May be, I deserve all the hatred.

Thus, spoke my head!

2010-08-13T07:41:00.000-07:00

Strange are the ways of life. Every time we begin to feel that the going is right, life topsy turvys it all. The topic of contemplation that is infuriating my grey cells today is the sanctity of human relationships ;-)

There are time when I am forced to wonder how 'close' is actually close when it comes to bonding between/among friends? Going by the same conventions, how 'true' is actually true and how 'fake' is actually fake when it comes to opinionated differences among friends? We are taught ever since our pre-nursery days that friendship is perhaps, the most beautiful intangible creation of mankind on the face of this earth, and that, friends are meant to stand by each other NO MATTER WHAT! But how relevant are these age old dictums in the face of the present times?

I personally fail to feel their presence in the moderately large web of friends that I move around in. The glorified notions of loyalty, perseverence, trust seem to have been hibernating for quite some time now.. Most of us aren't even aware of such voids and the marginally few, who are, fail to make any sort of amends on their end to bring back the bright old lustre to the once-revered relationships.

I personally opine that being frank and outright is definitely way better than being a lousy-mouse waiting for the right moment to act!

A Token of Thanks!

2010-07-06T07:49:00.000-07:00

Nostalgic Reminiscences is slated to reach it's 100th post shortly! :)

Fellow bloggers, I am sure, would understand the whirlpool of frenzied excitement rampant in my heart on achieving this landmark!

As luck had it, this blog could have reached its maiden century way back, had I not abandoned it all of a sudden. However, as destiny played its part, I am back here yet again waiting to be enthralled by its silent razzmatazz. However, I won't really give away all the credit to the destiny alone. I need to mention here, someone without whose encouragement and peppy motivation, my come back wouldn't have been possible so soon.

I don't really know whether he would appreciate this gesture on my part or not. Hence, I wouldn't take the liberty of disclosing his identity as yet. He's a new friend, the latest addition in my league of friends.. a common friend who transcended to the status of a sweet, nagging companion in an impressively short span of time. I don't think that I'll ever be able to voice it out in person or not, so I am scribbling my heartfelt gratitude for him right here, right now!

Dear friend, thanks a lot for taking the pains of going through every single post of mine listed here. I was and still am in awe and absolutely overwhelmed by this ultra cute gesture of yours, to say the least. I still am at a loss to figure out what actually drove you to this place. I've rarely come across anyone who showed such a keen interest in my insights. I am still groping in the dark trying to figure out what really made you take the trouble of going through every single entry of mine posted here.. No one has ever done that before, and I have no idea whether anyone would do it in the future or not. :P:D After all who really is cranky enough to read crankier things written by a slipshod like me?!! ;P:P:P

I would have loved to know your answers but since I see you getting geared up for your dream destination ahead, I don't really think it's feasible on my part to tickle your mind with my silly inquiries.. I am sure the tough journey ahead wouldn't spare you the time or energy to visit this place again..

I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for this truly amazing gesture. I am thoroughly touched and humbled by this maiden favor accorded to me, and would treasure it for years to come..

P.S. - Every time I now visit my blog, more often than once I think of you and your ultra sweet gesture and find myself thanking you from the deepest core of my heart.

Thanks, for reconnecting me to my world! :)

Fragments of Reminiscences

2010-07-06T00:08:00.000-07:00

While browsing through the message folders of my cellphone, I stumbled upon a few messages sent by a once-great-friend of mine. Life is queer and you never really know what the future has in store for you! The entire equation from strangers to friends, friends to buddies, buddies to the best of friends seems a little dubious to me, most of the times.

Anyhow, as my eyes chanced upon her messages, whiffs of memories came gushing forth.. I just thought of preserving the last remnants of a-once-beautiful relationship here, on my treasured space..

"I luv you maggie :-) thanks for making me feel so special.. And who says that the day was dull ?? You truly made my day.. I kept you waiting but chalta hai ;-) I dunno if you ll remember me some years down the line bt i always will .. :-) my mom and nanu are very happy for u did so much for me... And i really value those people who bring a smile on their faces and you just did that!! Thanks, and u'll always have me around.... Always :-) love"

This message had been sent on Feb 02, 2010. her b'day..

A lot has changed since then. And we have moved on happily with our no-talking-pact.

A New Wave

2010-07-05T04:59:00.001-07:00

Life is on the verge of a new tide. A new wave of renewed hopes with fresh promises is about to hit the shore of life. I'm about to get into my second year of Post Graduation. This might in fact, be my last year as a full-fledged student. I might study ahead, I might not! Speculations are rife and many..

There are times when I speculate about the future course of life..looking quizically at the times to come. How similar or different they would be with respect to my present life.. Since the thoughts are not really welcoming, I often prefer to dispel them.

However, sooner or later life WILL take a new course irrespective of what I feel or want .. and I would be compelled to follow its destined mayhem.

Till then, too much to think! ecisions are tough and impending..

Blogger's Retreat!

2010-07-02T07:56:00.000-07:00

Dear Nostalgic Reminiscences,

I know it's been quite some while since I made an appearance here.

Somehow for reasons yet not deciphered, I just lost the vigor to write anymore.

The hibernation lasted for over 100 days, I believe.. It goes without saying that during this brief interval, never even for a second did I forget the rejuvenation and solace that you endowed upon my poor self during the trying times.

Life did bring it share of ups-and-downs, mostly ups actually.. and I did feel like coming back to you and pouring it all out in a go.. Bt then..

Anyways!!

The news is that I'm back and this time with renewed vitality and enthusiasm. All this while, there had been friends and well wishers who kept refueling my spirits to return on my blogging spree. To my utter surprise, off late I came across an enthusiastic friend, who had the patience and inquisitiveness to read all, yes, I mean ALL my posts from bottom to top, in a perfect chronological order. May be, it was his enthusiasm that made me reconnect with you today or may be, it probably was the destined time for our reunion..

Finally, I am back.. with a promise of rebonding with you with even greater perfection and vivacity this time. :)

Cheers to this new beginning!

The Magic of womanhood!

2010-03-17T09:12:00.000-07:00

Crippled by the storms of life,

debilitated by the mockeries of fate,

she waits in excited reverie,

for the halo of the imminent blessedness,

to embrace her into itself,

for now and for ever!

Such is the beauty of faith! Such is the aura of the working of a female's mind.

She longs to see a ray of hope amidst a canopy of dense darkness...an epitome of unflinching hope.. such is her zest for survival!

Love Redefined!

2010-02-28T03:48:00.000-08:00

A thousand unspoken words,

a deluge of unbridled emotions,

an enigma of frenzied ecstasy,

a sky of countless ephemeral dreams,

a land of unheard symphonies,

an exquisite twinkle in the eye,

an indelible smile on the lips

the world calls it love,

I beg to differ here,

for,

I call it,

pursuit of happiness!

Love is in Me!

2010-02-14T05:01:00.000-08:00

Don't get too carried away with the ironical title of this post!

It has got nothing to do with my being in love. Rather it's just a cheesy way of casting away the volley of frequent questions and queries, that are often pelted at me by my near and dear ones! ;-)

Yes, to put it upfront;

I might not be in love, but love certainly is in me! (*evil laughter!)

Well, its Valentines! Like every year, it did create ripples of nervousness and excitement in my mischievous heart and like any other year, I preferred not to reciprocate the proposals coming my way, for reasons still unknown and undisclosed to my heart!

Guess my heart is still at the waiting end for My Special Someone! My senses are yet to encounter the reverberations of his destined arrival in my life... and then, for reasons unfathomable, I relish clinging on to my fate waiting for his grand entry with baited breath! :-)

2010-01-18T01:22:00.000-08:00

'Tough times don't last, tough people do!'

Quite often I condition my mind to redeem its vitality by assimilating this age-old dictum. However, there are times when I find myself questioning its integrity! Guess, we all always look for ways to caress our emotional fallibilities and wounds by way of introducing such witty and abstract notions in our wayward thought-processes.

A mere passing thought!

Love is...

2010-01-01T22:08:00.000-08:00

I couldn't find a better image to kickstart my blogging spree in Twenty oh Ten!*

How often do we feel mesmerized and moved, noticing a made-for-each-other elderly couple?

Hmmm.Quite often in my case at least!

A strange feeling of ecstasy and wonder grips my thoughts. I feel intrigued to walk up to them and observe their closely knitted world from close. It's a pleasure acknowledging the true embodiments of love, relishing their warmth and exploring a relationship that has been through almost an entire gamut of human emotions that one gets to witness in one's lifetime.

How nice it is to have someone by your side, someone special who has been an intimate companion in your life's journey. Guess now I understand what people truly mean when they say, that they are looking forward to having someone with whom they can grow old with!

May be, love isn't just about spending the rest of your lives together. It's about making each minute of each day of each year of your lives more live-able and worthwhile. It's about relishing the bliss of togetherness. It's about creating a miniature world of your own cocooned and nestled within unfathomable layers of love, warmth and unrelenting commitment.

May be, love is all about overcoming the 'We' in 'Us'!

Anyways, how would I know about this!

Wait till I explore, and let you know! :-)

Cheers to a new beginning!

2010-01-01T21:50:00.002-08:00

Another new year, another new beginning! New hopes, new aspirations and new dreams pave way for yet another blessed and blissful year ahead. Assimilating the same flavor, I look forward to relishing another endearing year here, at Nostalgic Reminiscences.

A sense of accomplishment dawns on my mind, as I look back and recollect the memories of the year gone by. A curious mixture of unfathomable emotions takes control of my mind. Anyhow, without digressing further from the flavor of this post, I wish you all a very happy and prosperous New Year.

Hope this new year adorns our lives with all that we truly DESERVE & DESIRE!

On a personal note, I am indeed, looking forward to this new beginning. I have already made a mental note of all that I strive to achieve and enjoy in the coming days. 2009 taught me a lot in the true sense of the word and I sincerely aspire to assimilate these lessons in my life henceforth.

Bidding Adieu

2009-12-28T06:10:00.001-08:00

As the year draws to its logical end, my mind is coerced into a realm of introspection and self-analysis. I am intrigued..I am excited..I am numb, and yet at the same time, prepared to rewind the course of my life and relish the flashbacks of the last 365 days that got added to my life span.

There are things that I want to know, there are answers that I still look forward to, there are regrets that I so want to get rid of, there are people I so want to be with and there are memories that I totally want to do away with.. Likewise there are people that mean so much to me that I just cannot afford to imagine life sans them and, there are ones that I now regret knowing! There are moments that I wish to wrap tenderly in some solitary closet of my heart, there are secrets that I still want to unburden, there are desires that I wish to fulfill and there are dreams that I want to weave into the fabric of my life.

2009 brought a whiff of new experiences! Adorned my life with outrageous new dimensions. There were moments that simply took my breath away, and there were moments that were a little to painful to endure. There were new arrivals, and there were painful departures. Happiness rained from all corners of the world, yet anguish din't seem to leave me away. Countless rounds of tears and laughter walked in and out of my life. College got over, and University life embraced me into its arms. Hundreds of new memories and moments filled my photo albums. A number of acquaintances were transformed into friends, and a lot of friends got transformed into buddies for life. The leftover memories of 2008 finally left my bereaved soul, and a whiff of fresh life welcomed me into its arms.

My mood swings amused me in the most unexpected ways! Yet in the end, positivity ruled supreme. Thousands of new lessons adorned my life. Each day cultivated and cultured some valuable learning in one way or the other. Thankfully, there were a lot of people who amazed with their out-of-the-box attitude towards life. I'm thankful to God, for letting me come across many such people this year.

There were moments and memories of 2009 that I would want to vent out here, but not just now..Till then, adios!

Random Ruminations!

2009-12-19T02:06:00.000-08:00

Here comes another wryly realistic outburst!

I was just wondering the other day, that why is being 'insensitive' considered 'just-so-cool' in the contemporary times?

Any answers?

Any one?!

I'm really intrigued to know your say on this one.

I just loathe people who believe in leading a life of I-did-it-my-way types!!

Occasional Ramblings!

2009-12-03T08:44:00.000-08:00

Off late, I have realized that almost 90% of people on the face of this earth, fail to respect and reciprocate the feelings of others. And an even larger number fail to express their heartfelt thoughts and emotions at just about the right time!

Do they even realize how torturing it is for those, who don't fall into such abuser categories?

Let me just put it upfront! Its painstaking for ultra-sensitive and emotionally weak people like me, who literally thrive on lighter things of life viz. feelings and emotions.

The feeling of not being 'understood' or being 'misinterpreted' or 'taken for granted' is just about one of the most miserable experiences that one can go through in one's life! Furthermore, the feeling of not being understood 'the-right-way' is so damn harrowing that I probably, would fail to put it into words...

In the End, it doesn't Even Matter!

2009-11-27T23:37:00.000-08:00

She is happy!

happy to be alone

happy to be cursed

happy to be abused

happy to be rebuked

happy to be forgotten

happy to be scoffed at

happy to be neglected

happy to be all by herself

happy to have been cheated upon

happy to have been relegated to the backdrop

happy to have lost the sense of belongingness!

In the end,

she is still happy to be 'who she is'!

That's why I say,

"In the end, it doesn't even matter!"

You Taught Me the Meaning of Life!

2009-11-27T22:57:00.000-08:00

I had been sailing on the waters of life

like a rudderless boat bereft of its direction

until my eyes chanced upon you one fine day;

relishing the hard hitting rains on your wobbling legs

trying to capture the heavenly bliss in your twinkling eyes.

I saw you getting drenched in the exquisite beauty of that fond moment

collecting a handful of rain drops in your tender fists

the divinity of nature reflecting immaculately in your innocent eyes

the bliss of the divine blessings radiating their aura,

on your admirable face

Enamored by the vivacity of that tender moment

I retreated to my inner self,

resuming my journey towards self exploration

with a never before zest and ecstasy!

A Nostalgic End!

2009-11-27T22:35:00.000-08:00

Isn't it amazing how life never fails to surprise us with its topsy-turvying circumstances?!

Strange, I tell you, are the ways of life.

So, with this I would like to pour my heart out on a recent experience that touched my heart in ways more than one! Finally, after a whirlpool of thoughtful decisions and ambiguities, my stint at CueBlocks came to an end. CueBlocks was my first job ever! I joined it sometime in May this year, May 11th to be precise.

My stint at Cue gave me a world of memories to remember and cherish all my life, I met some of the finest people in the world during my sojourn here. I got to know some real good people, whose memories and goodness would remain etched in my heart for years to come, Nosheen, Pancham Sir and Deepshikha di being the prominent ones!

A Wish!

2009-11-13T20:48:00.000-08:00

Broken ties of unfathomable love,

still nestle hopes of

reliving the glory of the

cherished times together.

Together or not,

memories would always

bring us together as,

"friends till eternity!"

8 Marvels - About Me!

2009-11-07T21:57:00.000-08:00

It's been about some months since I reverted to any of the tags, dropped in by friends and fellow bloggers. Time to be on my toes.!

So, here I am trying to wrestle with this one. This tag requires me to spill beans on some interesting facets of my persona. Huh! Lets see.

8 Favorite places to eat:

Sitting on the grass
Roadside corners
Stu-C (Just can't resist this one)
Fancy restaurants
On long drives
Anywhere in the campus while bunking classes :-)
Relishing sumptuous dinners prepared by dad at home
Anywhere on a free treat. I'm in for it any time :-)

8 Things I want scientists to invest:

A Time machine (Wish I could go back and mend the wrongs done)
A mind reader
Wireless laptops
A virtual library (to satiate the voracious reader in me!)
A friendship meter (lol)
An anti-aging medicine (Gosh!)
A flying car (I'm too sick of the burgeoning traffic!)
Any anti-depressant drug (to keep my spirits high all the while! Lol)

8 Phrases I use often:

As if!
Get over it ya.
Forget it! (Dare you laugh, Crankster!)
Come on!
Ways of life (Megha, who knows it better than you?)
Are you crazy? (Tanvi is just so sick of this one.Lol)
Easier said than done!
Nothing much :-)
Whatever!

8 Things I love about Winter:

The mistifying fog!
My black jacket.
Rainy winters
Catching up with friends over cups of hot chocolate
The warmth of holding hands
The very feel of winters
Stuffed paranthas and nans :-)
Cozy blankets

8 Things I am looking forward to:

A lucrative career
Marriage (Did I just say that?! Lol)
Ardent blogging
Compiling a poetry book
Delving more into literature
Exploring all the continents before I die!
Learning professional photography
An unwinding holiday destination in the Himalayas

God! I am tired tickling my brain cells. Time to take a nap!

Currently playing - 'You're beautiful' by James Blunt.

Let my Blog say it all

2009-11-07T20:29:00.000-08:00

I happened to read these lines somewhere,

"Life is not about the times that you BREATHE,

i'ts about the times that TAKE YOUR BREATH AWAY!"

Kudos to the author! What an incredible way to putting the real essence of life into perspective. I truly second his opinion. Indeed, life isn't just about leading a life of humdrum monotony,living everyday exactly like the day before.

As far as my take on life goes, I believe in leading a life of retrospection and reciprocation. I know I might sound a bit too intellectual or philosophical at this point of time, but trust me that's not what I'm trying to project. I've been a fun-seeker all my life or may be more of a 'seeker'. I don't feel embarrassed at all in confessing that I still indulge myself in Cindrella dreams, at the age of 21. As if this isn't enough, I still believe that dreams do come true after all! Having said that, I would also like to add that I've had my share of extreme dissatisfactions as well. Time and again,I've been jolted out of my illusionary dispositions. But hey, that doesn't stops me form dreaming again! Does it? or should it?

Nay!

I still yearn for more dreams, more such moments that would perhaps, 'take my breath away'. And thanks to Almighty's grace, there have been many till this very juncture.I would love to ponder and delve into them in my next post, now that I'm back to blogging! I just hope that the unbridled passion that is flowing in my veins keeps the momentum going :-)

Blogging! Nothing like it!

2009-11-07T20:10:00.000-08:00

As I look back and think about the months gone by, I am gripped by a sense of achievement and amazement! It has exactly been a year since I dedicated myself whole-heartedly to this blog.

Needless to say, it has been a hiatus for my emotions in the true sense of the words. I guess, life wouldn't have been that easy had I not surfaced my inner conflicts at this place, time and again.

This blog stood by me in times, when I needed an emotional buffer the most! It came up as a surrogate mother, with whom I could share all my trials and tribulations effortlessly. It came up as a true friend who stood by me through the roughest of circumstances. At times, I found myself wonderfully amazed with the emotional solace that came my way through this blog. It was through this place that I got to meet some of the most wonderful people in my life. Exploring blogosphere has been an out-and-out experience in itself!

I sometimes rue the fact, that my hectic schedules don't give me the privilege to pour my heart out any longer. But that doesn't stop me from loving my blog all the more further. I miss this incredible place like anything! It has been a Saviour in the true sense of the words. And probably, nothing ever would stop me from documenting the highs and lows of my life here.

Thanks, Nostalgic Reminiscences!

The Parting Words!

2009-10-10T08:47:00.000-07:00

We met, joined hands

shared our lives,

became a part of them,

and now its time, to bid adieu.

We made memories,

filled the photo albums,

shared our darkest secrets,

giggled over cups of coffee,

exchanged friendship bands,

laughed and cried together,

and now its time, to bid adieu.

We held hands,

cuddled beside each other,

wiped each other's tears,

brought smiles to our lives,

made them all the more,beautiful

and now its time, to bid adieu.

We stood by each other,

through the sickest of circumstances,

sailed through the rough times holding hands,

arrived at the threshold of womanhood,

and now its time, to bid adieu.

We stumbled over at times,

nursed each other's words,

learnt from such mistakes,

made silent moves together,

towards a better tomorrow,

and now its time, to bid adieu.

We weaved dreams,

rectified our faults,

mended the broken hearts,

meant the world to each other,

celebrated the times of our togetherness,

yet now its time, to bid adieu!

Cheers to the good times ahead!

2009-10-08T01:32:00.000-07:00

Since its the Friendships' month, the flavour of posts on this blog is bound be 'Friendship'!

I just love this picture. It captures the essence of friendship in a beautiful way.

I dedicate this picture to all my friends. Old, existing and new!

Since my old friends have been mentioned on this blog a couple of times. I now take the priviledge of enlisting the neames of a few of my new ones. The wings of our friendship have just started fluttering, and I believe that we'll travel a long way together, and plant countless cherishing memories in the years to come.

This one is for you all - Pooja, Shubhda, Navkiran, Kriti, Karan, Manpreet, Sumedha, Varuna and many more!

Unsaid Emotions!

2009-09-25T11:25:00.001-07:00

Hi folks!

I know I haven't been posting regularly off late. Time to be on my toes!

Anyways, today's post is dedicated to a very close and an extremely special friend of mine, Bistriti!

I met this amazing girl just a day prior to my Birthday this year! Little did I know that the Almighty had been planning to gift me something really special this year, by enlightening my life with her frequent presence. She is a charmer! She is a seeker!

She occupied an immensely special place in my heart even before I could know it!

I look up to this incredible girl, for reasons more than just one!

She is strong, independent and self-made! Not to forget, she is not just beautiful, she is someone who is no less than an embodiment of inner beauty in abundance.

I've seen her getting through the worst circumstances of life, in the best of spirits. I have rarely seen her getting bogged down so easily. Her relentless passion and thirst to compromise over nothing but the Better, catches my attention and admiration almost every single day of our interaction!

I probably got to learn some of the most interesting and useful facets of life through her. Her practical and serene approach towards life just makes me go gaga over her!

She has been leading her life on her own ever since I've known her, inside-out! She has been a power-house of limitless passion, unsurmountable zeal and immeasurable tranquility! She doesn't easily gives away even to the sickest circumstances of life.

Despite staying away from family, all by herself, I have rarely seen her going astray! She is one person who exactly knows her destination in a crystal clear manner, and is striving in lieu of attaining it in the shortest span of time!

I just want to wish her good luck for her future endeavours!

I sincerely hope that you scale greater heights of success and prosperity with each passing day of your life, Bistriti! You have got to achieve loads in life!

I just want you to know, that I would be there, always!

I'm Back!

2009-09-20T05:17:00.000-07:00

Hey chums, I took me around a month this time, to show up with a new post!

Sincere apologies for that. A lot of things have been keeping me preoccupied off late. But yet again, I couldn't just resist my urge of reverting to this self-made paradise of mine!

Things are showing signs of recovery at the univ campus! I'm having a ball of time exploring the univ life with friends. Oh! I can't even begin to tell you how much we enjoy doing this. We are a group of 5! I, Manpreet, Pooja, Navkiran and Kriti. There are others who show up once in a while and become a part of the mob:)

Its truly amazing being a part of this mini-world of ours! We share, we talk (endlessly), we frolic, we dance, we sing, we get drenched, we go crazy, we cry, we explore, we tease, we eat like gluttons, we study, we bunk lectures, we go insane, we fight??. No, we NEVER fight!

We manage to do the whackiest of things, with such ease and perefection that we surprise ourselves every single time with the outstanding results!

I just hope that the journey gets more lovelier and livelier with the course of time!

Amen!

Missing 'Life'!

2009-08-20T08:40:00.000-07:00

Hey all! Don't get carried away with the title of this post!

I'm not going to bore you with my unending rants and ramblings. In fact, this time I'm going to 'torture' you with a confessional post :) And that means, in case if you're in a good mood at the moment, don't just squander away your joy by reading this trivial piece of my mind!

I happen to be a little low today. Why not? I guess I've every right to feel the way, I'm feeling at the moment! I've just been out of college, and have entered the big world of a university. Regardless of the wonderful time that I'm having in the univ, I'm being paranoid by constant fleeting thoughts that happen to cross my mind haphazardly!

Life in the univ is no doubt, exciting. Yet, in my heart of hearts, I still nestle and nurture countless clandestine memories about my just-lapsed college life! I miss my so-called 'former world'! I miss my friends, the warmth of whose arms held me through all these years of graduation. I miss my teachers who added some valuable facets to my personality with their never-ending warmth and affection. I miss my not-so-organised and oh-so-adorable graduation life! Trust me,I really do!

I end up missing just about anything and everything concerning my college life. And I miss my friends like crazy! It's just so disgusting, to see the people with whom I shared three beautiful years of my life, drifting away to distant lands and dreams. Most of us have now taken up diagonally opposite professions. We've all opted for varied streams in far corners of the nation and the world. The everday-bond that had been connecting us for the last years of our lives, has gradually begun to lose its lustre! Yes, and it just bleeds my heart to see my world crashing down so mercilessly!

My life has been topsy-turveyed brutally! I no more hear from people who just a few days before, meant the 'world' to me. My cellphone is no more brimming over with their text messages. Their life is no more intertwined with mine!

I so miss our times of togetherness!

I so miss having Kanika by my side, patienly listening to my neverending bakbaks. I miss Nur, the 'tweety' of my life like crazy! I miss Deepika's giggles that forced me to smile,even in the sickest of circumstances. I miss my oh-so-cherishing talks with Rucheera.

It breaks my heart when I feel their absence in my life.

Wish I hold time, and brick back the magic of the former days!

Friends forever! (Dedicated to Kanika & Nur)

2009-08-11T09:07:00.000-07:00

The times of togetherness

might not return,

yet

the symphony of the celebrated moments,

still rings in my ears,

and

makes me think of you,

time and again!

Random Tits-bits!

2009-08-11T08:50:00.001-07:00

My heart still reeks of the memories

that stay embedded

in the deepest recesses of my heart!

Wish I could ever unlock them

and make them see,

the light of the day!

Life,on the Move!

2009-08-08T01:01:00.000-07:00

As I sit back and enjoy a day off in my sweet home, I am perturbed by a few fleeting thoughts, that keep haunting my mind every now and then. I feel still, as I close my eyes and lie down in retrospection. Its funny, the way my life has taken a 360 degree twist in the past couple of days. Life had never been so unpredictable and uncontrolled. I feel as if I am being weighed down by the surprises that lie in store for me.

I miss the times that I used to spend with myself! I miss being alone. I miss the late night meditation sessions. I so wish if I could still continue with my diary-writing regime. I so earnestly want to hang on to my nocturnal creative writings. I miss the times that have been left behind! I miss the times when I immersed myself into retrospection.

Somewhere in a corner of my heart, I also miss being around my old chums! I miss Kanika, Pooja, Nur, Deepika, Rucheera, Swinky so badly! I miss their pamperings! I miss the loving bonds that we shared. I miss their warmth and comfort.

Life at this juncture, is like a helpless leaf floating in the sea breeze. It doesn't knows its destnation, it doesn't knows its source. Yet, its regrets being carried away by the strong tufts of wind. I know the life that I am leading at present, is a figment of my doings! It was me who had willingly opted for this life. It was I who wanted the things to go this way. And I am very much making the most of it,yet ...

I don't know,

"Life is just Perfect, yet..."

Memory Snippets!

2009-08-02T03:57:00.000-07:00

Its Friendships Day today!

As I opened my eyes this morning, a smile spread on my lips as I noticed a Cadbury's chocolate lying next to me on the white bedspread. Admiring this beautiful gesture,I starightaway jumped out of my bed in lieu of thanking Mum-Dad for this overwhelming surprize. Tears of joy welled up in my eyes as Mum folded me into her arms wising me Friendships Day. What a brilliant way of kickstarting this special day!

In fact, I had almost drowned in the deluge of nostalgia that had set in last night, as Friends from all walks of life began pouring in their wishes on the eve of this super-special day. My heart kept skipping beats as I continued keeping a count of the messages that adorned my cellphone. Isn't it just amazing when you get to hear from all the special people in your life, in one go?!

Memories clouded my eyes as I finally retreated to bed around 02:00 AM. It was a strage sensation revisiting the sands of time, and getting drenched in the unforgettable memories of friendships that had embellished my life, through thick and thin. I was overwhelmed with the nostalgic reminiscences that transcened me into my childhood, school and college days. Once again, the 'child' in me came to the forefront.

I have so much to share on this topic that I will probably loose count of the time and space. Before I strike another keynote in the next post, I would like to mention a few names who literally 'made my day' in the true sense of the words with their warm wishes and sweet remembrances. My heartfelt gratitude to Dipika, Kanishka, Niharika, Anuradha, Gagan, Navneet, Shubhda, Pankaj, Zoya, Bistriti, Nosheen, Maninder, Tanvi, Arsh, Raminder, Kritika, Nur, Aesha for sending over such cute wishes. They will be safely nurtured in a corner of my heart, for years to come!

By the way, Anshita, Megha, Nishant, Manmeen, Pooja, Amarbir, Charanjeev, I am still at the waiting end???!

Friendship, and beyond!

2009-08-01T11:52:00.000-07:00

On the eve of Friendship day, my heart goes out to my web of friends scattered all around the globe. Memory snippets flash into my mind as I am struggling to come up with the right words. It is indeed a tough task, describing the essence of relationships through words! Giving dimensions to them, would demean their very sanctity and aesthetics.

Friendship, one of the greatest gifts of Almighty bestowed upon the mankind, deserves no explanation!

Friendship...ahem!

I can't even begin to tell what difference has this term brought to my life! Trust me,when I say that my life couldn't have been as 'liveable' as it now is, had 'friends' not been an integral part of it.

I am falling short of words in describing some of the best facets of friendships that changed my life forever, for the better!

Just want to say,

"Thanks you chums, for adding a dollop of love and blessings to my life."

Still Moving On!

2009-07-28T09:22:00.000-07:00

Hi peeps, just dropped by to remind you all that I am still ALIVE!

Yes, very much, indeed! But, just a little preoccupied:(

The last couple of days have been brutally hectic. To say that life has been a complete roller-coaster ride wouldn't be an exaggeration. As of now, I am still 'trying' to enjoy my stint at the University campus. Trust me, Punjab University campus isn't as chic as it sounds! The lecture halls are atrociously erratic. The crowd just doesn't matched upto one's expectations. To add to the miseries, the blistering heat leaves no stone unturned in practically ruining one's mood to the core! I still do not feel at home being a part of this prestigious university. But just the very fact, that two of my best buddies, Megha and Tanvi are also a part of the same territory peps up my mood, every now and then.

On the home front, things are as exciting as they could be! We've just moved to our new home and life is getting more and more lovelier and livelier with each passing day. I am still in awe of my new surroundings. Its truly incredible. Home has been never so blissful ever before!

All right! So, this is it for today!

I am a little hard pressed for time right now. Would continue with my rants and ramblings some other day:)

Remembrance!

2009-07-14T08:29:00.000-07:00

Its been almost 45 days since I saw you last. I know it has been a long time but trust me, I still feel your 'absence' almost every single day.

No matter how rarely I keep in touch, I do miss you like crazy from the bottom of my heart!

It suddenly seemed so uncomfortable, when I din't see you around me during the admission procedures for the Post Grad today. I did feel hollow somewhere deep inside my heart. Everyone inquired of your whereabouts, and then the nostalgic finally set in :(

I know that you're still at the waiting end!

I'll get back to you, once life resumes its normal pace. Trust me, I would! Till then, keep missing me:)

Hey Tweety, Missing you silly!

Yay! It rained!

2009-07-09T22:16:00.000-07:00

God! You're tuly amazing!

Thanks for blessing my city with some wild rain showers this morning.

Trust me, I couldn't have asked for more.

Finally,it rained! It rained like crazy. It rained like hell. Wow! It rained!

I wonder what's so amazing about their aura, that the very thought of "rains" makes me go crazy! I feel an undefined whiff of freshness exuding from within, everytime it rains. Needless to say, Insanity takes over me while it rains harder. Guess rains have been a childhood crush, right since I was born!

The 'child' in me overpowers the 'woman' in me everytime it rains! Though the expression 'woman' sounds a little wierd, I mean I am just 20 turned 21:) Anyways reflecting back on the flavour of the post, I am so in love with the weather today! I wish I have had a chance of getting drenched in the rains though. I so regret enetering the office right at the juncture when it started drizzling outside. And to add to my frustration, the stupid rains gathered momentum within minutes of my arrival. What a setback!!!

So, I was left with no other option but to get 'J' standing by the window and watching the passers by enjoying the intriguing rains. I felt so low, so deprived! How I wish, I could have been one of them. I would have left no stone unturned, in relishing the essence of these long-awaited, mesmersing rain showers. I would have gone insane splashing handful of droplets on to my friends. I would have had a good time jumping into the puddles with bare feet. I would have loved sipping my favourite Kaapa Nirvana, while out on a passionate spree under a flowery umbrella. Oh, what fun it could have been!

Aww! I just hope that I somehow get to enjoy my slice of happiness in these maddening rain showers. Rains, you got to be with me on this one. Lets have a great time together! You know,

"You, me and us" kinds:)

Fleeting Thoughts!

2009-07-09T04:58:00.000-07:00

I truly believe in a popular tagline,

"A lot can happen over coffee!"

I wish it rains, sometime soon!

Nothing can beat the feeling of getting drenched in the rain like crazy, and then rushing to CCD with friends to grab a mug of my favourite, Kaapa Nirvana.

Rains, Coffee, Friends, Conversations ----------> Life!

Rains, I'm still at the waiting end!

Embedded emotions!

2009-06-29T22:05:00.000-07:00

So, finally with the declaration of my Graduation results, my 3-year long association with MCM came to its destined end!

Hmm! Yeah,probably!

Though I'm still at a loss to get drenched in this reality. I wonder why this crude reality din't hit me hard as a rude shock as anticipated...?

Why am I being so indifferent to the memories of countless good and happy times that I spent there?

Why am I not getting jitters thinking of the tough times that made me undergo an unfathomable transformation?

Why am I being so apathetic to all these?

Am I going insane?

Oh,no! Not again! No more!

Sometimes, time plays havoc with safely-embedded memories and emotions!

Yes,it does! Big time!

Guess in my case too, time has spilled its magic! It has made me fall in love with an all-together different life, amidst a new environment brimming over with numerous new and unfamiliar faces. As I firmly believe, time is a Healer!

It has taken away those dreary memories that once brought tears to my eyes.

It has helped me get over those filthy memories that once ruined my mood, and deterred my spirit.

It has blessed me yet again, with a zeal to survive and come out victorious!

I'm so happy that I'm getting over my past and embracing my present and future with a new whiff of dreams and aspirations.

I'm looking forward to a new life! Yes, New Life!

New life in a new home, in a new city, in a new university, in a new workplace with new faces and new experiences around.

Frankly speaking, I don't feel rudderless or directionless any more, and that's reason enough to celebrate,I suppose!

2009-06-26T09:53:00.000-07:00

Ever wondered how different life would have been,had we been different from our present selves?

Had we been bereft of any of the essentials that complete us as an entity?

Do you think life would have been unrelated or you wouldn't have just cared to bother?

In case you haven't ever given it a thought, spend some quality time pondering over it. Trust me, you wouldn't regret channelizing your time and energy meditating over this sensitive issue!

Though, be prepared to be jolted out of your romantic dispositions in the very first brush with reality!

We all love ourselves. Don't we?

We look-up to ourselves in some way or the other. No matter how often or rare we acknowledge this fact, but somewhere deep inside our hearts, we really admire ourselves for a zillions things unsaid and unheard!

No matter how rough life gets for us, yet given a chance to change places with someone else, we wouldn't really appreciate the idea. We would rather choose to enjoy a tumultuous roller-coaster ride of life's ups and downs that would come our way, than putting ourselves in someone else's shoes! Wouldn't we?

Then why don't we apply the same principles in our behaviour while dealing with an immensely sensitive strata of our society, People with Disability?

It was a recent session on Disability conducted at my workplace by our very own, Norliana that moved me to silent tears of disgust and humiliation and urged me to come up with this post.

Despite bold claims on the part of humanity of according a fair and just treatment to all the classes in the society, a predominant streak of bias and inequality runs through its length and breadth. Lets accept it outright, that these towering claims fall short of seeing the light of the day in ways more than one!

We are yet to accept and embrace the crude reality! We are yet to embrace the so-called People with Disability with open arms and welcoming hearts. Whether we confess it or not, somewhere down the lane, knowingly or unknowingly we tend to look down upon them with elements of pity and sympathy! Don't we..?

Out of pity, we tend to offend our disabled fellow beings with uncalled-for aid and assistance. We often push ourselves to such an extent that we almost invade their privacy and in turn end up making them feel incapacitated or incomplete..

(to be continued..)

A dedication to my Daddy dearest!

2009-06-21T07:07:00.000-07:00

Yay! Its Father's Day today..The entire blogsville is blooming with special dedications to fathers' around the globe..I just couldn't resist myself in pouring out some of my cherished memories with my daddy dearest!

This one's for you, Dad!

I know it would be really silly to say these tried and tested statements that 'you're the best dad in this world', ,'the greatest father of all times' and so on and so forth.But what do I do Dad, when these are the most appropriate words that ring in my ears whenever I think of you..

Trust me, I wouldn't have been who I am today, had you not been there..had I not been born to you..had I not been a part of this lovely family that we reside in!

Irrespective of the fact, that we rarely communicate these days but still somewhere deep down my heart, you're always thought of, cared, missed, respected, adored and remembered!

I can't even begin to tell you that what you mean to me! Giving words to such thoughts would be like giving dimensions to my respect and feelings for you..

No matter how rarely we share our lives and talks these days, still you're someone whom I look upto in every sphere of my life..

I often address you by these funny names..Dad, Daddu, Pops, Popsy, Pa-pa,Pa and the likes,but trust me, nothing can beat the adrenaline rush in my heart when you call me 'Betu'. Its the best feeling in this world whwenever I get to hear such sweet adresses from you..I find myself smiling everytime you call me 'Aenu'..

Oh, that reminds me that how earnestly I want to thank you for giving me two of the best names in this world - Mohita & Aena! They are as unique and spelndid as you! I just love them!

Dad, you've given me every probable comfort in this world that I could have ever asked or desired for. And I mean it from the bottom of my heart, from the deepest core in my heart. Be it clothes, gizmos and gadgets, hefty pocket-moneys, lavish meals at fancy restaurants, fun-filled vacations, expensive Birthday parties, an envious lifestyle, everything. I know it would be stupid to say, but I won't really mind if life ahead gets tougher because you've already showed me the BEST times that I could have ever comprehended. Thanks for adding such wonderful times and memories to my life. They'll be cherished through out!

Sometimes when I find it difficult to sleep at night, I am often perturbed by the memories of some beautiful moments that we shared years ago. Memories of 'you & me' sharing some unforgettable times together!

I still remember them so precisely Dad, But do you?!!

Do you remember our balloon-fights, or our badminton-sessions, or the cycling rounds that we undertook..? Do you remember those aimless strolls that we undertook during late evenings in Jabalpur, when you held me by my shoulder walking by my side..How I blurted out everything concerning my life and friends during these walks..?!! Do you remember those crazy shopping times when we literally 'shopped till we dropped'..? I still remember that how you bought countless dresses for me in one single go a lot of times.. Do you remember our Remote-fights..with both of us yearning to take charge of the TV in lieu of catching up with our respective shows..? Do you remember how crazy it used to be, everytime we used to visit my school on the day of the results..with me clinging by your side, apprehensive about the awaited scores..and everytime we would come out beaming smiles with some great remarks and appreciations showered on us by my teachers, do you care to remember all these moments..?

Do you care to bother to relive those memories time and again..?!!

Atleast, I do and would continue doing them forever. Needless to say, they are truly the most prized possessions of my life..

Thank you Dad, for everything.

Despite the fact that I don't really express my feelings in front of you so often, yet I truly love and respect you from the bottom of my heart!

You're the BEST DAD in this world and I am proud to be your DAUGHTER!

Amen!

(Sorry for a day's delay!!)

Untamed Friendships!

2009-06-21T06:09:00.001-07:00

Hi Folks! This is a confessional post. So, incase you don't know me personally, there are probable chances of your getting bugged..

The fragility and unpredictability of friendships in the recent times takes its toll on me every now and then. I have had friends going through such rough times, succumbing to their after-effects effortlessly..

But now probably, its my turn to go through the same vicious circle of dwindling relationships!

Its always good to have friends but its even better to have 'good' friends. Contrary to my earlier notions, that there's always enough room for improvement during the friendship span, I now strongly detest and discard this myth!

People are bound to remain the same irrespective of the amount of love, care and affection that you shower on them. They are destined to show their true traits somewhere down the lane. And you just can't evade this reality. I have been lucky enough to have come across such people, this early in my life. Though I ended up learning this reality the hard way!

Its difficult in fact, its tormenting in the beginning to see some treasured relationships falling apart so easily. Its heartbreaking to realise that the good times spent together would never be created again nor would be the memories, that would continue to haunt your bereaved soul for days, months and years to come.

Yet, I wonder why I feel so relieved and rescued when I think about those memories, yes plain "memories"...I cann't tag them as 'unforgettables'! Rather some years down the lane, I would love to erase them from the spectrum of my memory , and would hate to relive them ever.

Dedicated to my life and friends in MCM!

My special thanks to all those people who made me tougher!

Trust me,your harassment brought the 'best' out of me!

2009-06-20T08:53:00.000-07:00

Isn't it amazing when you get to hear something good about yourself from someone whom you least expected?!!!

Well, it definitely is a pleasant surprise for someone super-sensitive like me!

Its reason enough for me to celebrate, and go around basking in the glory of that short-lived moment:)

Am I Content..?!!

2009-06-15T08:41:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I find myself raising the same questions time and again..

Why am I becoming so self-obsessed?!

But then, is it really self-obsession or just a figment of my imagination?

I believe that its quite obvious for anyone of my age to spend some handsome amount of time and energy in pondering over the future course of life!

I guess so!

May be, its not an obsession any more.

May be, I might get over it in a couple of days. Even if I don't,what's the harm?

Its never bad investing some considerable amount of time in one's future!

For the time being,I am enjoying my stint as a Copy writer.

By the way, isn't it ironical that a copy writer is running short of time in updating her blog on a daily basis???!!!

I know, its highly embarrassing!! Trust me folks, I am all geard up for being a regular updater next time onwards. .At least,I am working on it. Don't really know, whether I would be keeping in sync with the aspirations or not!

All said and done,

I would just like to add that I just love writing!

No matter, how often or how rare..I just love coming back to this place time and again!

Idyllic Ruminations !

2009-06-07T09:59:00.000-07:00

It has been a hectic weekend! Yeah, Weeke-n-d!

Yes, even more hectic and troublesome than the rest of the week..

Truly speaking,I hated this week..I really did! It almost deprived me of my usual vitality and vigour, happiness and wittyness. In short, it deprived me of my TRUE self!

Frequent pangs of guilt, mistrust and dwindling self confidence finally took their toll on my health. Not to mention, the scorching heat of the summers that almost ruined my mood every single day. I just hope that it rains some time soon. I really do!

May be, the climate was in sync with my mood this very week. Undecided and tumultous, dejected and fickle-minded..I don't really know what actually made me feel so low but whatever it was, it definitely RUINED everything- my mood, my health, my professional efficiency, my reading habits and so on and so forth! I am in no mood of experiencing it in the near future!

But yes,it did teach me something valuable in the end. I learnt how important it is to have faith in one's principles and priorities. No matter what the rest of the world feels, one must never give up on one's virtues and choices. I also realised one more subtle truth of life. I realised that it is good to vocalise one's honest thoughts about others' once in a while..In fact, more than that, one must make conscious efforts to peep into the minds and hearts of others' and dig out some relevant information pertaining to one's self!

No harm in getting some cruel jolts, in the very first brush with reality.

Remember, its better LATE than Never!

Having said that, I wouldn't mind confessing that it was tough, immensely tough!

I hated it, every bit of it. And it did waver my self confidence to some extent in the incipient stages. Though it wasn't late when I realised that it's no point getting immersed in retrospection just because some Tom, Dick or Harry found my nature objectionable!

As if, I care!

In fact why should I?, when I know that I wasn't even wrong completely and yet had to bear the brunt of all those misinterpretations!

Any ways, I am happy that I am out of it now!

Though it was a journey worth remembering. A journey from despair to hope, from dejection to reassurance. Somewhere down the lane, it did help me fall in love with myself all over again:)

A token of Thanks!

2009-06-02T08:01:00.000-07:00

This post is a dedication! I dedicate it to all those people who have been immensely supportive and affectionate to me, in the recent days.

Sometimes, the truth is too hackneyed for words!

Sometimes I find myself fumbling for the right words and expressions to express my heartfelt gratitude towards certain people who make every possible attempt to make my life a little more easier and happier:)

My life has taken a blind-turn in the last few days! I don't really know that where am I heading to? or, What would be my next destination?

All I know is, that I am moving on and on, at an increasingly nervous pace like a rudderless boat oblivious to its direction and destination!

Its high time that I seek rather sieze, the answers to the above raised questions yet I am too complacent to fish for the right answers at this point of time.

I don't even know whether what all I am writing makes any sense or not, yet in my heart of hearts I just want to go on and on...

Anyways, retreating back to the flavour of the post, I would like to mention the names of a few people who moved my heart due to their inexplicabe love, affection, care, concern, encouragement etc, in the last few days.

My humble love and apologies to Prats. I know that I haven't been good to you in the recent times. Yet, the blessions and affections that you showered upon me are remembered and cherished every single day! Words would fail to describe how much change,your efforts bring about in my life.

Loads of love to Mum, for understanding me and letting me take control of my life and its decisions. I'll be eternally greatful to you for all that you've done and for all that you would keep doing:)

Countless hugs to Megha, for adding a smile to my face every single day! Trust me, I've rarely come across a person like you (minus your PJ's) in my entire life,who so ardently believes in the ritual of Giving. Giving, in terms of love, time and space.

Sincere thanks to Nousheen, for her unconditional support and encouragement in the office.(Yes, I have recently started with my first job, ever!) Thanks for retaining your composure despite constant queries and bickerings on my part. They truly mean a lot, and would be cherished throughout!

A speck of thanks, yeah, just a speck of thanks to Hater!, for being a little more patient, nicer and composed off-late!

Loads of hugs and poochies to Kritika for being by my side emotionally 24*7!!! I truly admire your stoic approach towards life and hope to grab some of it in the coming future:)

A zillion thank you's to Kamal bhaiya in the office, for those unlimited refills of water in the tumbler placed next to my workstation. Every time he refills my tumbler, I am moved to mixed feelings of appreciation and pity.Thanks to him that my water intake has increased considerably, in resonance with my doc's advice. I might never express my gratitude to him in person, but I sincerely admire and appreciate his efforts!

Countless thanks to Mehak and Arsh for being by my side, on and off.

Random Ruminations!

2009-05-30T02:14:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, the harmony of life gets distorted by few trivial passing thoughts here and there.

Sometimes I get so intimately involved in the web of my personal priorities and issues, that i tend to sideline the clandestine developments taking place in the lives of those, around my vicinity. I sincerely fail to understand that why, Why do I do it, time and again?

Its just so disgusting! The feeling of being indifferent to people who help you get through the rough patches of your life. Its plain immodesty to overlook their emotional needs for compassion, refuge and guidance.

Its just so unlike-me,yet its becoming a facet of my personality with each passing minute!

Grr..What do I do?!!

Tagged!

2009-05-29T10:28:00.000-07:00

Tagged by Ms.R

I am a dreamer chasing a zillion dreams twinkling in my eyes.

Soft music tranquilizes my hyperactive senses. My favourites include George Michael, A R Rehman, Enrique Iglesias, Britney, Shreya Ghoshal.

Its the trivial things in life that make me feel elated and blessed-rain showers, smell of brewing coffee, soft music, good books, heartfelt conversations.

I strongly believe that relationships are meant for a lifetime, and they come without expiry dates.

I am blessed with the power of superb sixth sense. It helps me get through most of the hardships in life.

As the years are dwindling by, I am becoming a little more inclined towards superstitious (only about a few things in life) though I wonder WHY?!!

Nothing peps up my mood more than the prospect of good food. Otherwise, I try satiating my desire with anything palatable.

I am a nocturnal being. I am a total midnight freak! I find it difficult to sleep before 12:00 AM , with a zillion thoughts crossing my mind, every now and then.

No matter how much hard I try, I seldom succeed in HATING anyone in the true sense of the word! My strongest emotions remain confined within the four walls of Dislike!

Given a chance (and the permission),I would love to spend my life in a monestary, walking on the path of spirituality.

Still Life,on Pages...

2009-05-22T09:57:00.000-07:00

Still stiffled by the lingering memories,

still blinded by the aura of those exquisite times,

still restless by your deafening silence,

I feel cluttered and claustrophobic,

leading this aimless life of nothingness,

still benumbed by your anticipated touch,

still enthralled by the sudden twist of fate,

still chased by the depressing nostalgia,

still dumbstruck by your harsh words,

I am still in awe with everything,

that concerns you and,

still at a loss to embrace this hard hitting reality,

of your undisputed absence in my little world!

P.S.-Dedicated to my dearie!! Just tried giving a few words to her thoughts!

In Pursuit of Happiness !

2009-05-10T06:31:00.000-07:00

Prompted @ Tell a Tale.

As he opened his eyes in his lavishly-adorned,palitial bedroom on an early Sunday morning,he was startled to notice her unfamiliar absence by his side.

With half-opened eyes,he jumped out of his bed,and advanced towards the living room.Not finding here there,he got overpowered by a sense of anxiety.He called out for,in an audibly upsetting tone, "Madeline,where the hell are you,love?",as he made his way towards the guest room.His call was left unanswered.ating t

He was almost jolted out of his senses,when he did not find her there too. Feeling an adrenaline rush,he stood there for a moment,taking support from the bed-side table before retreating to their beloved bedroom.

Without giving a second thought,he hurriedly entered the room and approached her study table,as if driven by some divine intervention. Skimming through the contents of her expensive, sandalwood reading-table,his eyes fell upon a small note,addressed to him.Without wasting a second,he caught hold of it and opened the leaflet,that contained the following message written in her impressive handwriting:

"Happy Anniversary,William!

You've been a wonderful husband throughout.It was priviledge being your better-half.

But I guess,its time that I succumb to my inner voice.

I am leaving for my divine sojourn in the Himalayas,this morning!

You gave me everything,but I believe,that I now need a little more.I am leaving behind everything (that's you),in search of 'Moksha',my childhood desire and aspiration (as you already know.)

Hope,you would understand my quest for this spiritual accomplishment!

Yours in regret,

Madline"

He choked back silent tears as he finished her letter.Perhaps,these were the last words for him,from his beloved wife of 40 years!

Silence !

2009-05-08T05:22:00.000-07:00

Prompted @ Tell A Tale

(The prompt was to write a story on the theme of 'silence.')

A beautiful Sunday morning!

The sky was slightly overcast with dull grey tufts of clouds.Mariel admired the sudden romantic mood of nature,while getting into the front seat of her rickety car.The poor thing was more than two decades old.It was almost on the verge of giving up,after long years of hard labour and rough handling.As Mariel settled in her seat,fixing her seat-belt ,she noticed David (who was on the wheels) murmuring something in his characteristic tone.

Not wanting to ruin her cheerful mood,she asked him gently,

"What is it,Davy?"

"Nothing.I am just sick of this old car.Want to get rid of it as soon as possible,but why would you care to help me? I am at a loss to understand why don't you just let me dispose it off?" he answered in an authoritative manner.

"Oh! Come on, love.You very well know how much this poor thing means to me,to us! It was in this very car,that we brought our newborn Mary to home from the maternity clinic.It is special for both of us! Isn't it?" She replied in a soothing tone.

"Yeah,yeah.I know.Thanks for reminding me time and again." His voice became softer,as he reached out for her hand,and gently placed his over hers.

Neither of them spoke a single word for the next few minutes.It seemed as if both of them were lost in their treasured memories.Then,just as they were about to reach the airport,David broke the unsettling silence,saying

"Lovely memories,aren't they?"

"Oh! Truly cherishing and simply unforgettable" she answered in a matter-of-fact manner.

He continued further,"Do you remember,how much Mary adored this car as a child? See,these lovely bells were hung by her,when she was just ten." He said,pointing towards the wind chimes,that werehanging on the rear-view mirror.

She reached out to caress them with her wrinkled hands, and said,

"It seems as if time just flew away.One moment,she was our beloved,little girl who couldn't imagine to stay away from us even for a minute,but now she has been living her life all by herself ,for the last 6months in her university hostel. Away from you,from me.Away from Us." At this moment stream of tears flew down her cheeks,as she continued,

"You know why I can't afford to part with this rickety car? Its because,somehow it keeps me connected with the nostalgic memories of my beloved daughter! Though I can't aford to keep her with me all my life,atlaest I can derive some amount of solace,by treasuring a few of her childhood memories through this dumb and good-for-nothing car! We brought her Home in This!" Just then,she felt his left hand on her drooped shoulder,gently caressing it.

This sweet gesture conveyed his silent approval of her heartfelt decision.Wiping away her tears,with an incipient smile on her wrinkled face,she said mockingly,

"See,you made me cry yet again and,the tears ruined my eye make-up! Now would you mind lending me your prized hankerchief,so that I could fix up my make-up?"

Without uttering a single word from his mouth,he passed on his crisp,white hankerchief to his lady-love,and smiled back.

They enjoyed the rest of their journey,in an air engulfed in a beautiful silence!

Is this what we call, "Love"??

2009-05-05T09:44:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when I see around,looking at my friends,cousins and other unknown youngsters of my age,I am often intrigued. each of them has an all together different woe to share.I find them lonely, even amidst a hoard of friends,family and teachers. Though,these innocent young minds are still standing at the thresholds of manhood/womanhood,yet all of them have already had their share of grown-up experiences.Even within the tender age group of 16-21,all of them have already "loved and lost" atleast once in their lives,to say the least!

The fragility of human relationships gives a serious jolt to my innocent dispositions every now and then.Its just so disgusting. Isn't it?

Well,I am certainly not against the whole circle of loving and being loved. Love is undeniably,the most beautiful relationship that anyone can ever get into.But what makes me surprised,is the misinterpretation concerning love,rampant among the young hearts.

Love is not just a "Boyfriend-girlfriend" relationship! (By the way,the entire notion behind the bf-gf concept among todays's youth is ample enough to send a shiver down Adam-Eve's hearts!)

Love doesn't gives the license to play with your lover's heart,emotions and life. Its certainly not just about sending perennial text messgaes to your so-called soulmate or, constantly buzzing him/her esp at the odd hours of the day.Its not about exchanging roses and love-letters,and keeping fake Karwachauths(yes,FAKE!!!) in lieu of getting expensive gifts in return from your so-called hubby-to-be. Its even more disgusting to see some foolish girls breaking the sanctity of this esteemed custom,without even knowing a speck about its essence.I believe,its no less than a sacrilage!

Love is not about roaming hand in hand along the lake-side,just to exhibit a public display of your love.Its not about going for shopping together,expecting your lover to reimburse your extravagent bills.Its certainly not about checking out the fancy restraunts together, and then skimming through their fancy menu cards to lay hands on the most pocket-friendly platter.Its not about going on long drives playing ear-blasting music(in open jeeps,fancy cars) disrupting the traffic by rash driving.

My question is,Do we really need love at this stage of life.?

Is it even required?

Is it right to go through the trauma of heartbreaks and breakups, at the very onset of teenage?

By doing so,aren't we demeaning the sanctity of love?

Well,my answer to this would be,Yes. We certainly are depriving love of its natural charm and poise! It is really easy getting hooked with someone,but its inexplicably tougher to carry forward the relationship with a balanced amount of grace and dignity.In today's fast moving world,its not tough 'finding love',there are so many hungry hearts around ,yearning for love.But isn't it unfair,to get involved with someone,just for the sake of it?

How can you push yourself to love just about anyone or anybody who comes your comes your way? For what?

Just to please your peers,or your so-called 'deserted soul',or,just to showcase yourself as an eye-candy for others?

What makes life more tragic are,the abrupt decisions that we youngsters take in order to get rid of these relationships! No wonder,'break-ups' are the talk of the day.We find it so easy to put an end to these once-so-precious (now-not-so-precious) relationships,without even realising the consequences.Do we? Don't we?

I am sorry,if my write-up causes displeasure to any of you reading this.I wrote this,keeping in mind a veri special friend, who is having a hard time,dealing with her 'break-up'.

Dearie,don't loose hope.If He is the 'one',the 'One' meant for you, he would eventually come back or,rather you would give him a chance to prove his mettle.For the time being,let life take the best decision for both of you.Stop fretting over it!

Its neither your Loss,nor his Gain!

As I said earlier,Time is the most potent healer in the entire Kayenaat.Give your relationship some time.Just let time slip by.Eventually,it would bring out the answers to all your queries!

Let destiny and time weave their magic in your life!

Bloom again,to life.

Don't loose hope.As I often say,

Stay calm,

'The worst is yet to come'.

Marriage Bliss!

2009-05-05T09:21:00.000-07:00

This post is dedicated to my friend,Soumya.
Just a few days before,she rang up in lieu of informing me about her wedding! I was swept off the floor on receiving this sudden news,to say the least.
Here goes a tiny message to her:

Girlie, I may not have reciprocated the love and warmth that you showered upon me, overwhelmingly.But just take it for granted,that I do love you (I really do!) and shall always be there to guide you through adverse times.Don't forget, I am just a call away!

Congratulations,for the wedding.
May the two of you be together, till eternity!
Here goes a small poem, as my tribute to your wedding:

(The) most memorable institution created by mankind,that

arouses nostalgic memories of a beautiful past,

rekindles glittering hopes of a golden future ahead,

reaffirms our faith in the eternal unity of the two souls,and

immaculately binds them in a relationship of a lifetime,

adorable,enchanting and alluring as ever,it

guarantees the onset of a beautiful journey,fraught with

exquisite experiences of countless yesterdays,todays and tomorrows.

A Nameless Relationship !!

2009-04-22T00:37:00.000-07:00

Dearest Muskan ma'am, this article is dedicated to you,on the ocassion of your Birth Day!

During our temporary sojourn on this beautiful planet,we come across a lot of people.May be a few hundreds or thousands of them. We build up innumerable prejudices and notions regarding each of them. We admire some, we hate some, we rebuke some, we get jolly with some, we love some, we miss some, we instantly hit along with some, and we hate to even recollect some of them! We become friends with a few of them and develop close intimacies.

Now the friends, that we make are also of various sorts. Some of the friends are perennial,they stay by us throughout our lives, some of them move out of our vicinity and unfortunately, are never seen again. Yet,some others are available in times of celebrations or crisis, and some of them are even Worse than the worst of foes!

I have come across a number of people,in my short span of life. But rarely only a few of them, touched my heart in the true sense of the words. Among such treasured people in my life includes, you. I remember meeting you during my internship session in the studios of Big92.7 Fm. From day one,we hit along instantly. You were more like an elder sister or a mother to me, during those amazing days. Deeply concerned about my health, studies, teenage emotions, hurdles, failures, everything! I recollect vivid memories of our early morning 5:00 A.M. trips to the office,riding on the deserted roads. With half-opened eyes too,we managed to pull the breakfast show,"Big Chai" pretty decently.Creating the fabric (content) for the day,downloading clips from the FTP,getting the callers, managing the telox, looking for news highlights of the day, selecting the perfect songs to gel well with the weather,hunting for horoscopes to be telecasted, selecting the questionaire for contests and quizzes on-air, getting the traffic updates from Sunaina, fetching the weather and bollywood updates just on time. Despite these early morning chores, we used to kickstart our day enfused with energy and enthusiasm. Thank you, for giving me such beautiful memories to recollect, time and again.

Thank you, for taking the extra pains,just to ensure my well being and happiness in the office, for giving me wonderful surprises on my Birthdays, for sharing a few of the darkest secrets of your life with me, for beaming smiles at me round the clock in lieu of keeping me happy, for cooking something special for me at times, for giving due credit to my hardwork and dedication time and again, for counting on me, and most importantly, for making me feel so desperately wanted and loved!

The second round of my internship was never that memorable, probably because it lacked that peculiar whiff of your concern and affection!

I have so much to write,that I could probably go on and on. But due to the time constraints, I will keep it short and crisp, for the time being. Here's a small self-composed poetry dedicted to you and our relationship:

(Its a loop poetry)

It felt great,

great to be with you,

you made my days,

days so loveable,

loveable memories to relive,

relive the essence of our beautiful relationship,

relationship that binds us together,

together in a bond of love,

love that is so pure,divine,

divine were the moments that we spent together,

together we shall remain in this way for ever and ever!

Silence conveys it all!

2009-04-20T08:28:00.000-07:00

I strongly believe,that there are times in life,when our silence conveys emotions far more eloquently than Words. Once in a while,we adhere to silent ruminations in lieu of breaking the monotony of words. At times,we find a strange tinge of comfort and tranquility in our obsessive-compulsive silence. In such phases of life,silence becomes the most potent expression of our inner turmoil and conflict. May be,I am experiencing one such passing phases in my life!

May be,I don't wish to get out of this soothing refuge of silence. Or may be, I don't want to belittle the significance of my heartfelt feelings,by conveying them through mere words and gestures.I wish to sink in its ever multiplying depth,and get away with the harsh times.

This post is dedicated to all my college mates,who adorned my life for the last three years.But with utmost regret and remorse,I have to embrace the crude reality of your subsequent departure from my world.

The unforgettable memories of our amazing college life, would keep enriching our lives with mixed hues of happiness, joys ,sorrows and regrets. May we scale greater heights,with each passing year in our lives.

This one's for you,chums:

Pooja,Ekta,Mansi,Rucheera,Noor,Kanishka,Deepika,Swinky,Shruti...and specially for Kanika.

As far as the verbal expressions of our parting feelings are concerned,

"May be you'll never know,my be I'll never show !!!:

I am so glad to have met...

2009-04-18T01:37:00.000-07:00

In the journey of life,

I am so glad to have met,

someone special like you,

special beyond comprehension,

adorable beyond the scope of words,

indespensable beyond the array of emotions.

Needless to say,you complete me,

in every single way!

I am so glad to have met,

someone special like you,

who changed my life for the better,

gave me countless more reasons,

to smile and embrace life,

with an invincible spirit.

You made me familiar,

with the psychology of life,

a smile for a smile,and

a tear for a tear!

I am so glad to have met,

someone special like you,

who stood by me,

through the roughest times,

and has promised to remain,

by my side now and forever,

and this is what makes you,

all the more Special!

Raindrops..

2009-04-11T08:01:00.000-07:00

Rebelling against the sweltering mother Earth,they

adorn her with lusturous water globules,

instigating me to become one with

nature's playful moods, and

devote myself completely in admiring the

romantic vibes of the timid clouds,that seem

overwhelmed by their impulsive outpours, that

paint the canvas of earth in hues of blue,by their

showers of happiness, hopes and blessings.

The Final Goodbye!

2009-04-10T02:19:00.001-07:00

Inspired by & submitted to,
The Story Teller.
(The Story Teller is a blog that prompts us to write short stories,in congruence with the theme that "Every picture tells a story!" This picture is this week's prompt,and here's my take on it.)
I forgot to mention,its my first attempt at story writing.Bear with me!

He kept staring at her pale and beautiful face, its beauty marred by the ever multiplying wrinkles and dark circles.As he sat still,admiring its fading beauty for one of the last times ever, memories of their togtherness began flooding his mind. It broke his heart to see the most beautiful woman of his life, at the threshold of death. It was emotionally draining and devastating for him. Being a neurosurgeon himself, he could do nothing to ensure her survival.A string of tears flew down his cheeks,as he held her fragile hand in his, perhaps for the last time ever.

At that very moment, as if guided by some divine inspiration, she opened her puffy eyes slowly, one by one. Basking in the glory of this treasured moment, he felt as if his heart almost skipped a beat. She tried to mutter a word or two. But, words betrayed her bereaved soul. Even he chocked back tears, as he spoke. But,all that he could say was, "You gave me everything..." Ironically, this mere sentence encapsulated all that he wnted to vent out.

For the next few moments,they communicated in a non-verbal language through Eyes. Their eyes conveyed everything, that had been left unsaid! His, conveyed his heartfelt gratitude towards her, for giving him a LIFE! His eyes were the embodiment of his admiration for the generous woman, who had given refuge to an unfortunate orphan, in her home years ago. His eyes thanked her for her unending, overwhelming love, care and affection that she had been showering upon him ever since.Just then, he noticed a stream of tears welling up in her eyes. With a tug at his heart, he kissed her pale forehead, and just as he was about to bid her a final adieu, he witnessed a tragedy of the worst magnitude. He hold onto her hand as she heaved her last breath, and her soul departed for the heaven. He stood there for a moment or two ,admiring his foster mother for one last time and questioning the untimely exit of his,Saviour!

Tagged!

2009-04-02T23:29:00.000-07:00

Tagged by Dewdrops!!

So,here are 25 random things about me.

I am a thinker, dreamer and seeker.

I love admiring nature in its changing moods, preferably rains (rainy winters,to be precise!!)

I am the only child of my parents. So,I am well versed with the joys and sorrows of being an only child:(

Almighty has blessed me with a good number of friends. So many of them, that I have probably lost count by now.

I have never been in a relationship. I am yet to come across my destined "Mr. Special", someone possessing the qualities of head and heart:)

I am a compulsive-obsessive reader and writer.

I have had too many crushes nad have been a crush of many:))

I dream of bcoming the Best daughter, Best friend, Best wife, Best daughter-in-law and the Best mother in the world!

I am super sensitive and super emotional.I get attached to people, places and things quite easily, without any rhyme or reason.
I forgive and forget quite effortlessly,no matter what!!!

I just love spending time with myself. Now, that's another obsessive-compulsive disorder that has gripped me.

I am scared of heights and speeds!

I admire myself for easily empathising with people and situations.

I easily adapt myself to compromises:)

I am proud of my impressive personality and equally impressive linguistics:)

Its high time that I shed off the erraneous Leave-Me-Alone and I-D'ont-Want-To-Say-Anything attitude. Trust me, I am highly ashamed of this inherent shortcoming.

I reside in a realm of books and blogs.

I am a big time foodie. I love gorging on kebabs, biryanis, choupseys, sizzlers and fish curries.

I love catching up with friends over a cup of coffee. Trust me, they are the best ways of enjoying those awaited reunions.
I am a shopaholic! Though, I discovered it quite recently. I have a huge collection of accessories and jewellaries. I have an exclusive cupboard dedicated to them. Over the years, I have also accumulated a huge collection of handbags, wallets and mobile covers:)

Surprisingly, contrary to the usual trends, whereby girls don't pay heed to gizmos, I have been catching up with gadgets and gizmos, since long. I have been regularly updating my collection of cell-phones, i-pods, digicams, digital diaries, handycams, etc. So, I beleive that I am quite tech-savvy:)

I am addicted to friends, food and blogging.

I am overwhelmingly garrulous. My friends call me a chatter-box. I hate keeping my mouth shut! Though, I am patient listener, too.

I hate mathematics!

I loved completing this tag. Though, I am a little disappointed that it reached its conclusion, pretty soon. I would have loved to continue...

And the nostalgia sets in !

2009-03-21T10:11:00.000-07:00

This one goes for a former friend, who somehow,din't make it to my present and would never be allowed to pry into my future. This one's for you, Smriti!

Sieving your face in the crowd,

I seem loosing control

over my senses,

and the nostalgia sets in!

Moments of those celebrated times,

take control of my mind,

rekindling the ashes of

the leftover love and hatred.

Life seems witty,

throwing one of its

filthy challenges at me.

It shatters my heart to

accept your hatred coated abuses,

killing me over and over again,

with intensifying anger and pain.

May be, in a corner of my heart,

I still long for

mutual love and peace,

nurturing dwindling hopes of,

reliving those unforgettable times,

when time had almost

lost count and become one with us.

May be I still wish to

bury the mutual differences

and move one step ahead,

call out for you,

with a clear heart,

and open arms,

and embrace you in a tight hug.

May be ,its just a dream,

that might never come true,

leaving behind a trail of,

wounded memories and unfulfilled desires,

leaving me in the lurch,

the mercy of dwindling hopes,

till the time,

I again sieve your face in the crowd,

loose control over my senses,

and let the Nostalgia set in!

2009-03-21T09:52:00.000-07:00

May be, I din't realise,

When love was around,

with you by my side,

all the while.

May be I din't pay heed,

when feelings transcended words,

smiles conveyed treasured hopes,

and gestures painted the canvas

of life with love.

May be I never saw through your eyes,

that sparkled with true admiration for me,

and were always on a lookout

for my anticipated presence.

May be I missed that love,

that could have been mine,

all mine.

May be I fret over it in the coming years,

shedding silent tears,

and heaving painful sighs.

May be I missed that love,

that could have been mine,

all mine!

Easier said than done !

2009-03-21T09:25:00.000-07:00

Dedicated to Sunshine:

It was tough,

letting you go,

but its even tougher,

getting familiar with your absence.

It was tough,

hurling abuses at you,

but its even tougher,

recollecting them now.

It was tough,

ignoring your presence,

but its even tougher,

resisting your absence now.

It was tough,

living with you,

but its even tougher,

existing without you.

2009-03-18T05:10:00.000-07:00

I dedicate this poem to one of my good friends,Kanishka.
I would like to extend my humblest gratitude towards Megha,for providing me with this wonderful theme.
Here it goes,

Fading memories of those unforgettable times,
are still etched in my heart,
the dying music of our relationship,
still echoes in my eardrums,
incessant reminders of that amicable bond,
still shatter my heart into pieces,
the eternal fragrance of our long lost friendship,
still intoxicates my vulnerable soul,
the aura of your exiquisite charm,
still benumbs my fragile senses,
the encumberance of your undying memories,
still makes my soul go crazy,

and
dwindling hopes of a beautiful revival,
still nurture in the deepest recesses of,
my tender heart.

Love!

2009-03-18T05:07:00.000-07:00

Here goes another of my acrostic poetries,entitled as "Love",
.........................................
...........................
...................
.........
lustrous feelings of unsurmountable ecstacy,
overwhelmingly appealing and special,they
vanish into thin air within a split second,but stay
embedded in a corner of our hearts,for ever.

Life...

2009-03-18T05:01:00.000-07:00

LIFE
.....................
............
....
Lovable sojourn of blissful experiences,
inevitably dicey and intriguing,emanating
fragrant nuggets of intoxicating nostalgia,and
euphoric dreams of a scintillating future.

What's in a Name??!!

2009-03-16T05:22:00.000-07:00

Shakespeare had once proudly proclaimed, "What is in a name?".

With due respect to him,I beg to differ.I believe that a name is nothing short of one's deeply felt emotions and affections.A name,conveys it all. It conveys the subtle, treasured emotions of the giver,towards its owner. On a personal front,I have seen numerous parents-to-be running from pillar to post,in lieu of selecting the most appropriate and unique names for their upcoming darlings.Infact back home,I always fel immensely humbled towards my dad,for awarding me the two of the best names in the universe: Mohita and Aena!

While on one hand,Mohita is the formal one,the other one was borne more out of affection.That's my nickname.I am personally inclined towards the latter one.Its relatively simple,unique and peppy.As a child,I was enquisitive enough to know its credibility.My dad still holds the belief,that it is the most befitting name,that he could have ever bestowed upon his daughter.Dad,I love you for this.(muah*)

Now reverting back to the theme of this post.I got this serious urge to delve into the psychology of names quite recently,when I was gifted another set of new names by friends.So,the latest or latesht* ones are "Cuppycake" and "Masakalli".And to tell you frankly,I love the former one,as much as I love that charming song.It was,while I was basking in the glory of these new names,that memories of countless former ons,flooded my mind.I have been lucky enough to be gifted new names,mostly borne out of affection and excitement,every now and then.A few of the most special ones include,"Pilpilli,Moh,Mohi,Aenoo,Barbie,Sunshine,Noddy,Dushti.Bachchu,Doll,Shona,Princess,Miss Padhaku,Little poetess,Mollz." I cherish them,absolutely.They make me feel Blessed,Loved,Cared and Wanted!

May be that's why,its the best feeling in the world,when Pa calls me "Aenu" or, "Betu", and when mum calls me "Laado" or "Mohi".Nothing could ever beat the exquisite speciality of the moment,when Mehak (aka Kaddu) fondly addresses me as "Pilpilli",mercilessly turning and twisting my cheeks.I fing myself riding high,every time Tanvi calls me 'Sweetu".I experience mixed feelings9more of anger,of course) everytime Sandeep calls me "Miss Padhaku".Its always a special feeling when Prachi replaces my name with words like "Princess' or "Li' l poetess".I USED to be on cloud nine,whenever addressed me as 'Barbie",or Smriti cuddled by my side,calling me "Sunshine' or, 'Bachchu".

So,you see Shakespeare,there is no dearth of emotions in a name!

:):)

Dedication.

2009-03-05T06:36:00.000-08:00

Dedicated to my best friend,Anshita.

"Everyone has a 'Best friend' during each stage of life. Only lucky ones have the same friend in all the stages of life!"

Thanks sweetheart,for making me lucky!!

Goodbye Patty.!!!

2009-03-05T06:22:00.000-08:00

The followimg lines, represent a downpour of countless clandestine emotions that lay buried in my heart,until this moment when I decided to vent them out. At this juncture,I am determined to shed them off my heart,forever..!! I am in no mood of treasuring those painful yet, unforgettable memories any more.

The Sooner I accept this harsh reality,the Better for me.!!

And why not..???!!

I am all set to embrace it with open arms,this time. After all,it was Me,who walked out of the group.It was My decision.So,now instead of questioning it,I should either accept it or jump off the nearest cliff..!!

With this thought riding high on my mind,I am reminded of these poignant lines,that I read somewhere,

"Its really amazing when two strangers become the best of friends, but its really hard when the best of friends become two strangers."

This is it,Patty.

This is R-e-A-l-I-t-Y..!!

Lets embrace it,as earliest as possible,and MOVE ON..!!

2009-03-04T05:48:00.000-08:00

It was an unusually good day,yesterday. My phone was unusually flooded with calls.Friends from all walks of life,seemed to be missing me.Its always a pleasure being with them,any one of them. It felt great speaking to Nur,after about a fortnight.I am looking forward to having a great time with her at the farewell(sob*sob*). It was a pleasant surprise,getting to hear from Rucheera.It feels happy to know that she remembered about my exam and was courteous enough to inquire about it. Its always so good,conversing with her.We extract something or the other fruitful from our cheesy conversations. Megha's call made me feel special,like the way it always does.She's a charmer.She is one person who has always been by my side,even in the worst circumstances.It was a light hearted,peppy talk,just the way it has been since the last 5years. Shruti's call made me think twice.Taking into account,the increasing frequency of her calls,I feel happy.Genuinely happy!!
Her care and affection for me deserve a slice of my admiration..

Aaj Bhi...

2009-03-04T05:41:00.000-08:00

My first hindi poetry.

.Aaj yun hi kalam uthakar kuch likhne ka mann hua,

I am putting it up with an anxious mind..Your suggestions and criticism welcomed.Here it goes,

"Yaadon ke samundar mein jhaank kar to dekho,

aaj bhi meri yaadon mein doob jaoge

dil ki gehraaiyon mein utar kar to dekho,

aaj bhi mere khayaalon mein kho jaoge,

hasraton ki viraasat ko tatol kar to dekho,

aaj bhi mera hi naam padhkar hairaan reh jaoge,

sapnon ke bikhre hue shishon ko jodkar to dekho,

aaj bhi meri parchaaiyon mein khud ko dhoondhte reh jaoge,

jazbaaton ki kashti mein baithkar to dekho,

aaj bhi mere ehsaas mein beh jaoge

khwaahishon ki udaan bhar kar to dekho,

aaj bhi mujhe apne kareeb hi paoge"

This is dedicated to a dear friend,who is finding it hard to survive,after an unfortunate break-up.

I have just tried voicing out her poignent sentiments.

2009-02-27T21:29:00.000-08:00

My first attempt at Acrostic poetry.
But First things first,I would like to extend my heartfelt gratitude towards Prats,for inspiring all of us to tickle our grey cells and come out with something different.

MEMORIES
Mistifying reminiscences,rendering
eternally blissful ruminations and,
momentary lapse into nostalgia
Oh! I treasure them so fondly,
roller coaster rides of
inspiring moments and,
euphoric emotions, cradled in the
sea of eternity.

This post has been cross-posted at thw Writer's Lounge on 26th Feb'09

Acrostic Poetry !

2009-02-27T21:24:00.000-08:00

This is a different form of poetry writing,introduced by Prats,on the Writers Lounge.

Emotions

Embedded safely in a corner of my heart,they
move me to countless tears an laughter,an
ocean of intoxicating recollections and
treasure house of cherishing fantasies,
inevitable flowers of eternal fragrance
oblivious to the symphony of life,they are
nuggets of panacea,that urge me to muster the
sands of time.

2009-02-25T21:07:00.000-08:00

Needless to say,it is a proud day today,for all Indians.After what seemed to be an endless wait,finally fate smiled at us,at the Kodak Theatre in Hollywood.The Oscars finally landed in our kitty.As Resul Kutty held the Oscar trophy in his hands,tiny droplets of tears must have welled up in thousands of Indian eyes round the globe.I too,was one among them!!

The proud moment when Resul became the first Indian to receive this prestigious award,in the magnificient Kodak theatre,amidst a cacophony of the top actors,directors and producers of the world,moved me to heartfelt tears and laughter.The Indian Film Fraternity finally carved out its niche,at the Academy Awards.

We had been waiting for this day with bated breath,ever since the Academy Awards came into existence in May 1929.Needless to say,these are the greatest and the most prestigious awards in the entire moviedom.
However,amidst the celebrations that followed the memorable award ceremony,what caught my attention was the unfair treatment meted out to Resul on the part of the Indian press and media.I was painfully disappointed to notice that A.R. Rehman was the sole eye candy,who hogged all the praise and attention.

But hey,hold on. Don't take this slight criticism on my part,in the wrong stride.All that I wish to point out is,the unequal treatment accorded by media,to all the winners,courtsey Slumdog Millionaire. After all,Rehman was not the only Indian who was bestowed upon with the Oscar statuette today.
Resul Kutty,Gulzar sahab,Little Pinky equally deserve the praise and applause for their significant contributions in their respective fields.How many of us were even aware about the short documentary film, Smile Pinky ,which was India's entry under the nominations of the Best Documentary(short subject) award???!!! Since the last few days,the entire media hype and wishes for the Oscars revolved around Rehman and Danny Boyle.None of the channels paid even the slightest bit of attention to the other aspiring winners,who also deserved our prayers and attention.They were also a significant part of the race,after all!!

I don't care for others,but for me,all four of them: Rehman,Gulzar,Resul and Pinky deserve equal honour and applause.I feel proud to be their countrymen.
Three cheers for all of them!

And yes,for me Kutty and Pinky are as prominent as Rehman and Gulzar.They are all Masters in their respective fields.

Way to go,Indians.

(This article has been cross-posted at the Writer's Lounge on Feb23'09.)

Random Me!!! Part-2

2009-02-20T06:30:00.000-08:00

10 things I HATE about myself:
:(:(

I am sensitive, so much so that I end up hurting myself unnecessarily most of the times.
I am too frank. I am yet to master the art of hiding my true emotions.
I can't stand people with poor linguistics and bad grammar. I think I shouldn't loose my calm in such situations.
I Forgive and Forget. By doing this, I deprive myself of learning from my past experiences.
My inability to say "No" to people.
I get irritated quite easily at times, for no rhyme or reason. I high time that I shed off my I-don't-want-to-say-anything attitude.
I get attached to people, places and things very easily.
I am excessively impatient and impulsive.
I am addicted to my friends.
I love my Past, so much so that I am not able to do justice to my Present.

Just an honest emotional outburst!!!

Random ME!!!

2009-02-15T07:03:00.000-08:00

10 things that light up My World:

Interaction with little kids (preferably, less than 2yrs in age). I believe, kids have amazing healing powers, they dispel away my gloom within a fraction of seconds.

Any unexpected message or call from an old friend,who hasn't been in the vicinity since long.

Surprize gifts. They are more than welcomed anytime.

A good book! The excitement of getting a chance to red something good or relateable, transports me to cloud Nine.

Nature/greenery lights up my world. There couldn't be a feeling better in this world than the comfort of being in the vicinity of nature. I just love admiring nature in its changing moods.

The prospect of any mouthwatering dish being prepared by mum, peps up my mood. The ever enchanting aromas of Biryani, Fish curry or Manchurian emanating from the kitchen, makes me go gaga.

Any song by Ronan Keating/ Bryan Adams/ Rahet Fateh Ali Khan transcends me to a realm of utopia.

Catching up with any old friend over a cupof coffee.

Recollecting old memories by flipping through the photo albums, cards and letters shared with friends.

Still trying to figure out the last one, and many more...

Laught it off !!

2009-02-15T06:55:00.000-08:00

Life can be Rough at times.

It might topsey-turvey the circumstances.

But , don't stumble.

Stay focussed. Don't loose your calm.

Just laught it OFF , and move ON !!

Idyllic fantasies

2009-02-15T06:24:00.000-08:00

A few of the probable changes, that would be accomodated in my life, five years hence...

The intensity of my love and affection for my current friends wouldn't remain the same.(of course, with an exception of a few.)
My cellphone wouldn't be flooded with sms's and calls from the same people, as presently.
My cupboard would be devoid of my course books.No more piles of hefty books and notebooks would be stuffed into it.
My postal address wouldn't be the same.
Many of my favourite outfits would have been discarded, and replaced by new ones.
I'll not be using the same cellphone.:(:( Probably by then, N250 or N360 or similar versions would be leading the mobile markets by then.
My Orkut and Facebook accounts would be accomodating a few more friends by then.
I'll not be using the same car as I do now. Infact, my kinewould have been dumped in one of the junkyards by then.
My hair would have probably regained their lost length. I hope that I am able to chase th targeted length by then.
I would have read atleast a hundred more books and authors by then.
My blog's archives would be stuffed with countless posts, each one of them,enriched with the memorable highs and lows of my life.
I would have had a professional degree to my credit.
Who knows, I might have been cupid-stricken by then (~~evil laughter~~)
I would still share the sizzling chemistry with Tanvi, Anshita and Megha.

Still Thinking of You

2009-02-09T07:21:00.000-08:00

During moments like these
when life is still
no thoughts hovering around
and no dreams being woven
I am often transcended
down the memory lane

I revisit the sands of time
when you were by my side
I still relive the moments
of our ephemeral togetherness
while you consumed almost
every waking moment of my life

Such recollections drive me crazy
moving me to laughter and tears
and with a tug at my heart
I then reconcile to my fate

May be your time had come
and I shouldn't question your exit.

Dedicated to my special friend who is no more in life.
But her memories still flash in my mind every now and then.

Happy B'Day Brother!

2009-02-08T02:33:00.000-08:00

It is 8th Feb, Pankaj bhaiya's Birthday, or should i say Chandigarh's ladla...Rj Pankaj's aka Pammu's Bud-day!:):) With all due respect to his mammoth fan following and rockoing celebrity status, for me he is not even an inch more or an inch less than my doting brother (rakhi-brother)/ friend / ex-colleague. I've been thinking about him since morning, since its his B'day, and therefore, I decided to pen down my heartfelt emotions for this special brother, so that I could re-read, and cherish our amazing friendship time and again.

I met this amazing guy probably, two years back (18th or 19th Feb'07, to be a bit precise) in the studios of Big 92.7 Fm, chandigarh. His humility and etiquettes left a lasting impression on my mind. He had absolutely no airs despite, being the most sough-after Rj of the tricity. He instantly earned countless brownie points for his simple and down-to-earth attitude. Our friendship scaled great heights after I joined the organisation a an intern. That was perhaps, the most beautiful and memorable phase of the entire relationship. We became good friends and began weaving memories. Infact, he entire Big 92.7 family was a close-knitted extended family.

Well, coming back to Pankaj, he is one the best persons that I have ever met. Down to earth, humble, soft-spoken, caring.These might seem like tried and tested statements that we normally get through, but trust me, there is not even a speck of exaggeration. He is undoubtedly, a gem of a person!

He is the best son that any parent could wish for!

The Best brother in the world!

The Best friend in the entire universe!

The Best Rj that any radio-station can wish for!

The Best Chachu that Mannat could have ever had!

(Btw, Mannat is his cute, little, adorable niece)

Coming to a few of his achievements,he is one of those gifted people, who are endowed with an entire spectrum of talents. He is not only a great radio presenter, but a remarkable Actor as well. Only few people ar aware of the fact that he was the first choice of director, Rakesh Om Prakash Mehra for the celebrated role of "Aslam" in his Oscar-nominated movie, Rang De Basanti. As ill luck would have it,Pankaj somehow couldn't continue with the project, and the role fell into Kunal Kapoor's kitty. Even, I am convinced, that Pankaj would have definitely been a better option but nevertheless, I know that the Almighty has planned something more Special for him.So, lets wait for the destiny to unfold,and for the time being lets keep our fingers crossed!!

Forget about acting, he is an equally talented singer. His voice has an unconventional charm and poise ,that makes his listeners go weak in their knees. He made it to the semi-finals of the Indian Idol! He often sings on his show, the Big Gedi,and trust me, it creates a wonderful ambience in itself.

He has been a celebrated theatre artist with more than three dozen plays in his kitty. Not only theatre, he even made it to Tollywood. Some of his significant roles were seen in Kasmir, Haqeeqat, Zindagi Ek Safar, Mission Fateh, Jo kahunga sach kahunga.

All in all, he is a bundle of talents and success.

But more than success, fame and everything else., he is a Master of words. His simplicity embellishes it personality all the more further. He is a rockstar, he is a charmer and o wonderful human being.

And an amazing friend too!!

I wish you all the success and goodluck ahead.!

My life with Friends...

2009-02-07T04:57:00.000-08:00

This one goes for my friends.. I am trying to recollect some of the very special memories of my friends in the last three years, 06-09., the special three years of my unforgettable college life!!!

Sharing the sickest of Secrets with my Best(est) friend, Anshita. My constant companion for more than a decade. Though I am a little disappointed due to our tech-savvy modes of interaction, the letter writing has almost relegated to the backdrop! :(:(

The wonderful moments with Tanvi. She's a sweetheart. The two of us share an amazing chemistry.She is just a Perfect friend. In fact, to say that she is my Agony-aunt won't be an exaggeration!! Every single time, I find myself landing into trouble, she is the one who is summoned for, immediately.

Countless good and bad moments with Manmeen, one of my first friends in the college. We've had a blast in our college times. We were just the perfect two-some, Partners-in-crime!! Memorable moments with her include, those never ending chits-chats over coffee. The Cafe-Coffee-Day used to be our surrogate abode.

Some unforgettable moments with Pooja. I now miss those rounds of giggles and chuckles, that were inevitable in our friendship.

I am also reminded of Prachi and Shivani, my Bulls Eye mates. We were the perfect "trio". The months of January and February in 2008 were probably the best memories of our short-lived trio.

My childhood mate, Pragya. We've had a roller-coaster relation (as best described by her). Thanks to our I-give-you-a-damn attitude towards each other. Ironically, we never made common memories!! Yet, due to reasons still undeciphered, there is some special chord of friendship and togetherness that binds our hearts together.

My school mates, Antra, Anuradha and Divyangana also made cyber and telephonic appearances on and off, in the past three years. We were a group in our school days.Infact, there were two more friends, Anjalika and Niharika. But unfortunately, we lost contact after the tenth standard. I have probably had my Best memories , till date with them. Love you, chums!!

This list would be incomplete without a special mention about Nur. I met this remarkable friend in my college, and the chemistry of our friendship rocketed to greater heights ever since. Unfortunately, the college life i almost on the verge of conclusion. Yet, both of us are looking forwrd to a new phase of our friendship.

My heart often tiptoes into memories of some special moments shared with Kanishka. She has been no less than a sweetheart. I think that i would probably miss her once the college gets over. I wish her all the success and a good life ahead.

Countless khatti-meethi yaadein with Deepika aka Deepix,the Little Angel of my life. She is unique in her own special (rather, crazy) ways. I will miss our crazy chit-chats during the winters of 08-09.

(to be continued)

2009-02-04T01:02:00.000-08:00

I read it somewhere, and instantly fell in love with its credibility, aptness and reasonability in the recent times.

It goes something like this:

"The Most Painful Moment of life arrives when your Care is mistaken as Interference."

Today, I've finally gauged the inherent depth of this under-rated statement. Nevertheless, such occasional moments of mounting anger, disgust and defeat , somehow are bereft of vanishing way my incessant, beaming smile and an invincible spirit towards life and its vicissitudes.

Infact, in a way, I've developed a sort of comradeship with the troubles cropping up in the journey of life.

They hardly fail to hold my interest any longer!!!

Cheers!!!

Harbinger of Heart....

2009-01-28T08:30:00.000-08:00

There simply couldn't be a better way of venting out your feelings than presenting your loved and special ones with a Red Rose..!!

Trust me,
It Works..!!

Cheers!!!

Ultra blessed...

2009-01-27T06:18:00.000-08:00

Friends.!

Friendship...

Celebrating the good times,

getting through the hard ones.

The Other side!

2009-01-27T05:57:00.001-08:00

Distance matters.!!

Sometimes it takes more than a trillion years to take a Single Step,!

March ahead.!!

The civilisation would follow later.

Totally in sync with a popular punch line,

"Barriers break , when people talk."

So,,

"Let's talk".!!

A pleasant surprise!

2009-01-18T07:04:00.000-08:00

It has been raining out here since last night.
I'm loving it.!!!
Guess there couldn't have been a better way of recharging myself.
An earnestly-waited sunday, late morning , the sound of thunder storms hitting the eardrums, the sight of raindrops hitting the ground, a mug of steaming coffee by my side. Now this is what I call life!!!
Serene , still and soothing.
As I lie mesmerised by the changing moods of nature, cuddled in my swing , a sudden wave of new, uninhibited vitality and unfathomable ecstacy rises within me. Baffled about choosing my new read, I skim through the covers of the few books lying by my side. Paulo Coelho's The Alchemist, Salman Rushdie's Haroun and the sea of stories , The Pakistani Bride and The Changeling... Still undecided, I aimlessly switch over to my cellphone. I skim through through the unread messages, shooting back replies to a few of them. Finally, having nothing to do, I start punching words onto this page.

There is something Special about this entire blogging concept. I feel so calm after voicing out my sentiments on this page. In a way, it lends a shape to my feelings.It quickens the pace of the thought process ,channelising my mental faculties. Makes me feel so light hearted and high spirited. I tend to feel secure that the present experiences of my life, wouldn't be squandered away uselessly. Rather, they would remain by my side, in the guise of heart-felt words and sentences, all through my life. Incase, I refer to them some years down the line, they wouldn't be devoid of their sheen and glory.
Like this amazing morning!

I Love Rains.!!

2009-01-17T07:49:00.000-08:00

I love rains!! There is something special about them.! I keep pining foe them round the year 24*7. There is an exquisite aura about them that transcends me to imaginary thoughts. Right now, I am being reminded of a cute little nursery poem on Rains , that my mum often recited to me in my childhood.It goes something like.."Rain ,rain go away,

littli Johny wants to play..."

(Hmmm,, memories.

So beautiful, I tell you.)

In fact, there were a great many of them. "Johny johny...",, Humpty Dumpty..." ,, "Twinkle twinkle...".

I vividly remember a few downpours that I seemingly enjoyed during my childhood in Bhopal and Jabalpur, where I completed the early years of my schooling. These places were accustomed to sudden , frequent and torrential downours. That's probably how I nurtured my special bonding with the rains. I loved them then, I even do till this very moment.!!!

Those all-pervading memories of getting drenched in the rains while on way to school, pining foe slipping my hand out of the window of the bus, just to collect a handful of droplets,, getting down from the bus without covering myself under a raincoat or an umbrella,, jumping into the muddy puddles hand in hnd with Anshita , and then being perturbed by the itching sensation in the muddy shoes all through the school hours,, enjoying every inch of the classroom decorated with umbrellas and raincoats spread round the class in lieu of getting dried, running away to Mangal bhaiya during the recess to relish the delicious potato rolls in the misty weather.

Memories, I tell you.

Pricless!!!

Thank you, Christ Church Girl's Convent for such amazing memories.

Thank you, Anshita for being a special part of my life, Then, Now and Forever.!

Thank you all those friends who made this journy memorable; Akansha David, Anshu , Aesha, Jyotika Kohli, Meenal, Niyati, Saakshita, Pallavi, Esther, Neha Shrma, Richa, Shreya, Deepshikha Ghosh, Toshi, Hina...

Sorry, incase I have missed out anyone. It's been more than ten years since we met last. But the wonderful times that we shared still remain fresh in my memories.

Idyllic Thoughts...

2009-01-08T07:08:00.000-08:00

As I try rewinding myself after an exhaustive day..I am impulsively hooked on to my i-pod. I beleive that there could be no better healer than Music at times like this..Music is truely endowed with an inherent charm , an unparalleled aura and colossal therapeutic virtues. As far as my memories take me, I have always regarded music as a surrogate mother..It has always worked for me. I have always experienced an immeasureable bliss in its varying moods.Right from the early years of my life, it has been my friend, philosopher and mentor..!!
I am trying to recollect and take down a safe note of all the melliflous melodies that have been enchanting me "kal,,aaj aur kal." Some of my favourites include:

Ajeeb dastaan hai ye,
kahaan shuru kahan khatam...

Everything I do...(Brian Adams)

Bulla ki jaana ...(Rabbi Shergill)

Aate jaate,hanste gaate ...Maine pyar kiya

Yaaron dosti badi hi...

Purani jeans aur guitar...

One Love... (My favourite)

Jaane kyun log pyar karte hain...

Yaadein yaad aati hain...

Pehla nasha... (Nothing can take away the charm of this song)

When you say nothing at all...

Teri Ore...

Jaane kyun dil janta hai, tu hai to...

Chhoti si asha...

Tujhe sab hai pata meri Maa... (It clogs my eyes with tears everytime I listen to it.)

Kuch kuch hota hai...

Dooba dooba rehta hun... (A rage in itself)

Jaane kya chahe mann baawara...

Ain't it funny... (Jennifer Lopez)

Ya rabba... (sentimental)

Listen to your heart...

Doorie... (Atif Aslam)

Right here right now...

Tum se hi...

O humdum soniyo re...

Aur aahista kijiye baatein... (Pankaj Udhaas)

Whenever wherever...

Aaoge jab tum o sajna...

Swear it again... (Westlife)

Luka chhupi...

Aao na.. (mesmerising)

Ye tumhari meri baatein...

I just wanna spend my life with you...

Kabhi kabhi aditi...

Baakhuda tum hi ho...

Khuda jaane...

Saawariya...

My heart will go on...

Tu bole main bolun...

Show me the meaning of being in love...

Jashn-e-bahara...

Bebot...

Nazrein milana...

Taare zameen par..

Ghar aaja soniya...

Jaane kya dhoonta hai...

Hum tum...
And the list is endless...
Goodnight folks...!!

Where am I heading to..?!!

2009-01-06T07:24:00.000-08:00

Its ironical,,even after being Myself for more than two decades,,I am still at a loss to foresee my life even 5 years hence..!!!
Strange.!
Perplexing.!!
Appalling.!!!
Quite often these days,,when I sit and think about my life ahead,,an envelope of fear and uncertainity cocoons my vulnerable psyche..Contemplation leads to perplexity,,perplexity leads to fear.,,and finally, fear gives way to countless fazing thoughts.
Though, just a few months beforehand,,I would have never paid heed to such startling notions..I was one among those super zealous youngsters carrying glitterings dreams of a bright future ahead in my enthusiastic eyes.
Like others of the same age,,I also entertained high hopes of a personified existence. I cherished dreams of achieving everything that I ever dreamt of in the shortest span of time. I wanted to do so much for my parents,,my friends ,indeed myself and my prospective family ahead.! Wish I could do that even today.!!
One probable regret that I would always harbour in my heart is.................(Neah, forget it.)
As a child, I always made my parents feel proud of my achievements in academics , sports ,extracurriculars. The treasureable medals and certificates are undoubtedly, my most prized possessions till date. Since the age of 9-10, I aspired of becoming a Biotechnologist..My mother stood by my me,,fanning all my dreams and desires. My Dad too went a little too further in reciprocating my desires. I had almost reached my terminus,,when destiny played its part. I flipped my stream..Took up Journalism with high hopes of making it Big in the dominion of media and communication. Today, when I was about to reach my journey's end yet again , I find myself standing at the same cross-roads. The wide array of the available career options has muddled my determination. I am at a loss to choose among MBA , Media and Mass Communication , PR and Advertising , Master's in English Literature..
However,Whenever I dare to dust off my dreams, chasing away such filthy feelings..the fanciful thoughts of a mesmerising time ahead mellows my heart. So what if I am oblivious to my professional growth ahead,,so what if I am oblivious to my prospective family ahead. Whatever may be the circumstances, I would still lead my life in the same modus, in perfect synchronisation with my dreams..without a speck of bargain.!
I have alwys been perturbed by this over-rated statement,,often put up by friends , teachers n' elders.."Aena, where do you see yourself 5years down the lane..???.!!" Eehhhh...its pricking..!! But today,, I earnestly wish to decode this riddle..So,here goes a sober attempt...
Five years down the lane...
...........................???!!!!
Well,, seems like something illusory though.
But on a serious note, Definitely life would be a great deal easier..,,devoid of the present enigma.,,with all confusions sorted out,,and all fantcies attained.
I would be doing something substantial,, would be more independent , rather self-dependent..!! On a lighter note, I would be more responsible, my carefree attitude would have to be dispensed with.!! I would be shouldering the responsibilty of an entire family..In short, I would be set free from my present "aimless life of Nothingness!".
I would definitely have achieved More out of life,,rather More out of Me..!!

Reflections

2009-01-01T09:09:00.000-08:00

As I bid adieu to the former year and welcome a fresh year with open arms...with eyes fraught with new fantacies, hopes and aspirations,, with heart brimming over with the trail of some truly unforgettable memories,,I am transcended to those wonderful times that were bestowed upon me in the preceeding year..2008 added yet another chapter to my ruminations. It offered a whole new array of roller coaster rides of experience..It was a superb mixture of some really fond moments,,special memories ,, new relationships,, new academic jumps,, coupled with a few strained and unwelcomed reminders as well,,for instance, fallouts with 2 precious friends,, sudden departure of a special friend,Rucheera ...
However,, with each passing year..I tend to realise the unpredictability of life and human behaviour more and more.
Some of my fondest memories of 2008 would include:

The incipient bonding with Smriti...we hit along quite instantly..She gave me some beautiful memories to cherish..The internship session in Big 92.7 fm,, hangouts at CCD, Fun Republic , Gopal's , HM's , PVR , Sindhi's shall always remain etched in my mind, the giggling times at the British library,, the notorious laughters at the cafetaria,, the day-long rides on the college swings ,, those never-ending gossips in the celebration grounds,, those incessant sms's ,, those evening chat sessions on orkut ,, those late night calls,, the unexpected shopping spells for accesories and bags,, exchanging unexpected yet frequent gifts.....I miss everything .. But interestingly,,I also admire the changed circumstances.We are no more "Friends"..yet whatever little times that we shared,,and the uncountable memories that we created will always be cherished..
Times change,, Memories don't..!!

I also fondly recollect my cyber-moments with my Bestest friend , Anshita...She's been my support system for more than 12 years in a row. She is a rockstar,, she is a charmer. Come what may,, she is one person,,who would Always stand by me..There is not a single speck of doubt about it..She is my mirror..she is the only one who has an access to the darkest secrets of my life..Inshah-allah,, we'll continue to share the same chemistry foe years to come..!!

I also treasure those few , rather countable moments that I shared with Ritika in Big 92.7 fm.
This girl is an embodiment of strength. She taught me many subtleties of life in an immensely short span of time. She is someone whom I would always look up to for advice and assisstance, in life. Her one particular advice "Be strong, emotionally" always hovers around my mind..I am even working upon it.,and the results have been amazing so far:)

Oh, this journey down the memory lane of 2008 would be incomplete without a special mention of someone very special in plentiful special ways..- Mehak,,urf ,,,"Kaddu". I met this innocent girl on my birthday..and got captivated by her magical spell instantly..She's my sweetheart.,,my adorable princess..She's more like an elder sister.. I treasure the beautiful memories that we created..The countless photographs,, countless sms's and the countless cares and concerns that we hold foe each other ,,are more than enough to keep the tree of our friendship intact.!

Some affectionate moments were spent with Noor also.,,surprisingly. We have been maintaining a Love-hate relationship for 3years now..though finally ,,finally we have started enjoying our relationship. There were plentiful fond moments with her too.For instance,,the disastrous get-togethers at CCD..Trust me,,they were Disastrous..!! The incessant tongue in cheek remarks round the year..But towards the end of the year,,we became really good friends,,yet again..!! We started relishing each other's company,helping out each other in times of need,,openly favouring each other..Memories multiplied quickly. We came closer..She often surprised me by dropping by unexpectedly at home, bringing a cute smile on my face..We would spend hours nagging each other ,, fighting over trivial issues , with occassional puns..What so ever,,I loved each and every bit of it..She was the only one with whom I would share all my self compiled notes , without my usual hesitance..Things became better when we caught up again in Dehradoon on Christmas..I had a time of a lifetime..She was a perfect host, for a change..(She had to be,,after all I had specially come down to her hometown)..It was fun..Her constant cares and concerns make me feel surprised even today,,bt now I have started valueing our relationship as much as she..All I can say is,"Nur,finally we Click!"...

Recollections..!

2008-12-20T00:37:00.000-08:00

Proceeding with the same string of thoughts...

The wonderful memories of my college life shall always remain embedded in my soul..We shall remain united in thought, action and ailment..! My college life gave me many new reasons to smile..!! It introduced me to an entire unexperienced gamut of emotions..It endowed me with so many new chums..some of whom went on to become really special..!! Quite a lot of them.

It introduced me to an intricate web of interesting people..When I say interesting;I mean it in the literal sense.!! For instance,the functional english group..credited with the most eligible and scholarly students of the college,,undoubtedly, was a treat for the eyes..infact,,for the mind..because of the interesting mix of personalities that it harboured..We had a wonderful time interacting,,and exploring the various facets of each other's persona..

When we started out,,it was almost a Fiasco..but then,,before we could all realise ,the everyday motions of life took over. We began to fill the photo albums and create Memories..We began sharing secrets, and weaving dreams..We shared smiles and wiped away the tears..There was such an amazing chemistry between a few of us that the air seemed to crackle with electricity..!!We started venturing out of our cocoons and began exploring one another's realm....and ovr the minutes,weeks and years,,we built layers and layers of memories..! We started communicating in a non-verbal language consisiting of rolling eyes, shoulder shrugs and waving palms..From being perfect strangers ,,we became perfect friends..!!! Absolutely.."perfect friends" encapsulates it all.!

As nuggets of nostalgic reminiscences come forth,,memories touch the expanse of those countless moments spent together..Moments of those occassional laughters,,well-planned mass bunks,,falling out over trivial issues,,coffee breaks in winters,,bumping into each other in the library,,admiring one anothers attires,,accessories and handbags :),,sharing jittery nervousness in the examination halls,,chat sessions on orkut and facebook,,hunting foe notes,,late night sms's,,excitement during the festivities,,amazing group discussions,,discussion ovr those impending homeworks and projects,,And those countless occassions that moved us to laughter and tears......the list is Endless.!! When I look back and recollect those beautiful memories...They leave me Speechless.!

Lemme now introduce my Functional English or we fondly say,,Funky mates in a nutshell:) Our batch was a fascinating bunch of around 35 young ladies:) Here goes some interesting facets of their personalities...

Neha- Miss adorable,, cute, smart ..!

Anuradha- Aah,,she was undoubtedly,,"The Performer" of our group..Be it sports,,dramatics,,singing,,dancing..she is a bundle of talents..!! And surprisingly,,equally remarkable in studies as well.

Swati Paliwal- Shy, reserved . But endowed with a superb sense of self dignity and alienation from the rest. I wonder why she keeps underestimating herself,,all the time.??. In a few things,,she deserves my admiration.{Well,,this is a confession:)}

Sumiti - Sweet,, serene ,,"Miss Brainy of our class"... I admire here for her remarkable sense of simplicity and softness.

Pallivi - Gorgeous,, "Mistress of Killer looks"..

Natasha - Sweet, innocent, soft spoken but utterly Amazed , Dazzled and Confused with even the minutest familiarities of life..

Prigya - Chirpy, pretty, bubbly... Be aware here innocent looks are totally infectious and deceptive:) she's a sweetheart.. with well defined goals in life..I am sure she has a Long way to go,,in the judicial kingdom..!!

Sabrina - Prigya's roomie:)...SMART,, soft spoken..with an admirable dress-sense.

Mohita - Hey,,Don't you think that the self-congratulatory references to one's own achievements just don't spell class:)..!!! Kidding:)No descriptions regarding myself..Would deal with it ,,in detail,, some other time..

Prabhnoor - Intriguing,, smart,, bubbly.. We have been sharing a love-hate relationship over the years..Though i believe that love has finally taken over.. She is simply unpredictable...but bubbly otherwise.

Arpan - The newly wed damsel of our class.!! She is gifted with an attractive personality,, good communication skills...We missed you this year..Mrs. Arpan:)

Surbhi - Cute:)

Alisha - Sweet,, intelligent ,, chirpy..!!

Shruti - A great person at heart but hugely misunderstood.. Immensely emotional,, helpfull..A happy-g0-lucky kinda person..!! Love ya..!

Tanya - The fragile damsel of our class...Highly soft spoken and sophisticted..!

Aditi - Strong,tough, smart..with a peculiar sweetness..!! An amazing representation of a modern girl..!

Diksha - Sweet, reserved with a latent chirpiness..She mostly communicates with her "Colgate smile ".

Aishwarya - A beauty par excellence.. No further comments.

Priyanka - Perfect communication skills.,,intriguing personality.

Varsha - Simple...sweet,, diligent.. with an unbridled spirit to achieve Big in life..!! Sometimes,, I feel that she could be an excellent journo..!

Smriti - Adorable,, highly organised and sophisticated.. A perfect support system foe her friends..

Swati 2 - Pretty,, smart...(hey don't take it as "pretty smart").. with aspirations of achieveing Big..!! Endowed with a brilliant mind....though she doesn't takes it that seriously..I hope she does..! She is a complete sweetheart..with a potential of achieving mammoth success in future.

Zoya - Admirable,, reticent.."Miss Frankness"..I absolutely admire this trait of her's..!! She talks straight..No double standards..! A superb illustration of a true friend..

Aastha - Smart,, confident.. An amazing person to interact with.

Kanishka - Bubbly,, chirpy...the "teddy bear" of our class....extremely sensitive and emotional..A great person at heart..!

Niharika - Shy, serene...a silent observer.. Endowed with a beautiful personality.

Shweta - one of the most Interesting one ... she's the "Little Einstein" of our class...shes drives us crazy with her out-of-the-world questions.. Very emotional and affectionate..embodiment of unbridled vitality..and an urge to seek more. She has the confidence of facing even the most embaressing situations of life with an undeterred spirit. I Salute her for this..!!

No rhyme or reason..!!

2008-12-20T00:16:00.000-08:00

Finally...the endless series of examz came to a subtle standstill..

Giving me reasons to relax and Breathe..!! Feeling so rejuvenated..

The Functional Viva was as rocking as expected....infact..a little Nostalgic too..

Brought back memories of the wonderful years that I had spent in this college..Perhaps,,these were the Last internals that we had..I would be passing out within a span of 3-4 months..leaving behind a trail of unforgettable memories..

I have had some really treasureable moments..

Love-hate relationships with friends.

Impeccable bonds with the teachers.

Indelible memories of cafetaria,,gymnasium,,rock climbing,,Functional english lab(My permanent Hideout),,the solitary swing,,vatika,,those intriguing cane-huts,,celebration grounds,,the library..

and Everything else that connected me with the college in ways more than one..

I had been dreading the Parting days since the very first year...bt the inevitable time beckons me now..

I have determined to face it boldly..bt I am aware that no amount of preparations,,rehersals or words would stand by my side when the Day would finally arrive..!!

It breaks my heart to contemplate about it..!

Aah..Why good things in life always come to an end..??!!!

No Room For PRETENSE...!

2008-12-12T07:32:00.000-08:00

One thing that I probably Hate the Most in my little realm of kith n' kin,,is an omnipresent, all-pervading spirit of Pretense.
I hate it.!
I hate it from the deepest core of my heart.
Why do we blemish our treasureable possessions with nuances of sham/masquerade..??!!
Why do we inflict disgrace on them on the mere pretext of exhibiting superficial care n' concern for our loved ones.??
I don't want myself to make half-hearted attempts of providing false comforts to any one's ruptured soul in times of distress..
Trust me..Even if I take upon My case,,for instance,,
Nothing puts me off so overwhemingly, than a bogus n' flamboyant show of false praise/pity/comfort..by my loved ones.
I would rather appreciate their conduct,,if they stay at an arm's length n' let me oveercome the trials n' tribulations of life, in my own fashion.
Bt,,hey,,don't misconstrue my perceptions..!!
Don't think that I am oblivious to the cares n' affections of my friends, family n' well-wishers.
My thoughts are in absolute resonance with the warmth n' tenderness of their relationships.
I totally agree with the diffused reality that..
There's nothing more precious in the world than the feeling of being Wanted..!!

I'll miss you, Rucheera...

2008-12-08T05:39:00.000-08:00

The sudden drought of emotions in my heart could convey perhaps, far more eloquently than the most flowery of words ...,the deep percolations of grief, agony n' restlessness that have probably cocooned the emotional hearth of my heart.

This is perhaps, the finest illustration of facing consecutive set-backs in my life,,that i've been accustomed to,,since the previous month..As very well explained in d preceeding post of this blog, exactly d same day of the previous month,,my world hd suddenly collapsed 2 pieces..!! Life seemed 2 have come 2 a standstill.

.Bt my emotional faculties came 2 my rescue,,fostering in me the courage 2 wage an irrevocable struggle against such adversities of life.
Once I decided 2 succumb 2 my inner faculties,,life seemed Easier,,infact,much Brighter n' Happier than before.! I fought back d distressing tymz n' came out laughin,,infact "guffawing" , at d trivial notions that hd been hovering around my mind in d former days. I decided 2 embrace life with an all-together new Vigour, Vitality n' Strength.

Life indeed, Smiled at me. All my snobbish hopes of denouncing d wordly affairs of friends n' peers, came dashing 2 d ground. Yet again, I succumbed 2 d humble, sincere n' honest affectations of friends n' dear ones. I was no longer d bereaved soul. The disturbing silence prevailing in d deep dungeons of my psychology was soon lost, amidst a cacophony of peers,( old,,best n' d new ones.!!).

Big Lesson Learnt..!!

2008-11-07T07:53:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, the worst or the most agonising situations in life bring out the Best in us.Those few moments of extreme mental trauma,indeed, become the fondest memories of our moral valour and mental patience,and stability,,a few years down the line..!

What seem like countless moments of unsaid, unheard heart-aches, actually serve as stepping stones in helping us achieve the requisite mental constancy in such dreadfully distressing situations.I realise that its easier Said then Done but,the only way of combating n' coping with the most distressing phases in life is by fervently looking for the slightest possible speck of positivity even in the gloomiest of situations..

Its pretty futile, perishing away our time,energy and emotions in contemplating the probable causes n' consequences of such upsetting episodes.The superlative attempt of going outta such traumatic episodes is by shedding all the fears,frustrations,infuriations,emotions and even tears, in Solitude (rather than making a public display of personal catastrophes) and get away with those filthy feelings.
After all,the world wouldn't come to an end.Life would still embrace us with open arms.So,never mind,pull up your socks and, promise yourself to come out mentally n' emotionally Unaffected in case we encounter more emotional fiascos in our future endeavours..

If a supersensitive person like me,could do that.
I am sure you too can.!
I have decided to forgive her...
Rather, all I would like to convey and remember is...
"Thanks Sweety...For making me tough..!!"

My heart keeps pounding...

2008-10-15T08:50:00.000-07:00

My heart keeps pounding with a gamut of emotions,
emotions of our relationship,
emotions of our togetherness,
such frenzied feelings would keep me occupied throughout my life,
for time blasting days, months, years n' In-shah-allah till eternity,
my heart keeps pounding all day long,
making me realise of temporary stay on this planet,
until my soul would fly off , to be reunited with you amidst the heavenly abode,
my heart gets shattered realising your painful and all-pervading absence,
piercing its broken pieces into my ruptured soul...

You made me realise...

2008-10-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

You made me realise,,
those countless emotions cradled in the realms of my heart,
You made me realise,,
my true worth in the undisputed depths of my heart,
You made me look up at this world with an invincible spirit,
helped me peep into those deep dungeons ,
that lie hibernating beneath the crust of my heart,
You gave me an entirely new World to live in,,
fraught with aspiring fantacies n' cherishing dreams,
fraught with countless moments of girlish joys...
n' helped me construct a realm bestowed with my imaginary castles
and unfulfilled fantacies,,
You made me understand the true meaning of life..
Your presence transported me to a world of Utopia,
brimming over with friendship, care, warmth n' love,
You made me realise,,
the true persona of my inner self,
You made me become...
the one,i am today...!!

I hate this world...

2008-10-06T10:00:00.000-07:00

Well, this was one of my first compositions , scribbled long ago, while I was probably in 7th standard..
The chief inspiration behind it was the initial outbreak of a dreadful era of horrifying Terrorism,,after the World Trade Centre's debacle.

" I hate this world,
but why do i hate it?
for its bountiful of sorrows,
and there are none willing to borrow,
Oh! my Lord, this earth is pityful,
but moreover, it's shameful,
its bountiful of wars and terrorism,
and its all due to man's religious fanatism,
Alas! man are blatantly blown and cut,
and surprisingly,our mouths are mum,and lips, shut
Oh! my Lord,why in this civilisation,
we have none for apologisation?
it is indeed, a matter of enormous pity,
for these great ,skyscraping and towering cities,
why don't the natives pause these fanatic culprits,
by arousing the humanitarian spirits,
I am sure a day is bound to be reached,
when these towering cities will crumple to a meagre beach,
deluged with the water of Humiliation,
finally putting an untimely end to this great civilisation..."

A tribute to Womanhood...

2008-10-06T09:39:00.000-07:00

I wrote this one somewhere down 2004 when Congress President, Mrs. Sonia Gandhi emerged victorous amidst a huge political turmoil..I have never been politically inclined towards Congress but her unanimous triumph in the Union elections left me spellbound...and i just couldn't resist penning down my proud sentiments for this admiring lady.
Here it goes...

" She is an inspiration for women,
who elevated to power defeating all men,
she had a pitiable and painful history,
that turned her life into an unending mystery,
she fell in live and, married an indian,
and there off started a new life,
she lapped her husband's dying mother,
and earnestly supported him who had by then:
already lost his dearest brother,
she witnessed a new era of indian politics,
while her husband rose to power defeating all critics,
but yet again, she faced an assassination,
which put an end to all her fascinations,
she lost her loving husband and became a widow,
left behind with two growing kids coupled with past dreadful shadows,
she nurtured them well,
till they matured intelligently well,
and ultimately joined the indian politics on public demand,
with a dream of mustering Congress under her command...!!"

Encumbrance of a curtailed friendship...

2008-10-05T07:48:00.000-07:00

This one was composed way back...while i was in my school ....for my one of my best friends,Tanvi.!!

"It's sad to see your dreams meeting a miserable end,,
specially those related to your Bestest friend,,
when the heaven resembles close to hell,,
despite all my strenuous efforts to tell,,
wanting you to recognise my true sincerity,,
that which you mistakened to be my impropriety,,
it's hard to see the two of us with anyone else,,
not with each other,but amidst everyone else,,
but,was this the only way to make each other incalculably sad..?
do we acknowledge our faults as so maculately bad,,

Regardless of all our efforts n' imploring deeds,,
and all our pending bashes n' treats,,
regardless of all those moments that we wished to spend,,
those that we regrettably never got to spend,,
despite, all the sufferings that we've faced,,
so intense,that would nevar wished to be retraced,,
regardless of all those feelings taht could never be unfolded,,
despite all those tears that we've been shedding for each other,,
and all those cards that had never been regrettably given,,
and all our mistakes,,which i know,,would never be forgiven,,
I still hope,,that an exquisite moment would come some day,,
which would shine through the divine ray,,
when we'll actually realise the depth of of our Friendship,,
and would blissfully revitalize our relationship..!!!

And it really really Did Happen.....!!!!!

One Single Step...

2008-10-05T07:27:00.000-07:00

It's all about a single step to begin with,
its all about one single smile,to begin with,
its all about one single "Hi" to begin with,
its all about one single warm gesture to begin with,
it is indeed a game of primarily one single step,
but once initiated,it extends to a gamut of emotions,
it is all about making a New friend,
adding another name to our long list of friends
embellishing it all the more further.

A friend enters your life in the vein of a new hope,
with a promise of accompanying you in glitches too knotty to cope,
tries making you feel privileged,,wanted n' special,
she nurtures you in her own special ways,
with an amazing blend of affection,warmth,passion n' never ending cares
....................................................